When I'm with you

Chapter 15

For the first time ever, I could say that I hated Gab's driving skills. This was because in just a blink of an eye we were already in front of Jane's house.

I was deep in thought as we made our way to her house, thinking of all the worst case scenarios. I could imagine Jane snapping at me after I told her what happened. She begged me not to do anything reckless and yet, regardless of my promise, I still did it.

I struggled to think about what to say to her. I chose my words carefully and ran through them repeatedly, making sure to talk in a straightforward manner. I was so caught up in it that I didn't notice I was speaking my thoughts out loud.

"Hey, what are you murmuring over there?" Gab asked, with a little grin on his face.

I felt my cheeks heat up out of embarrassment.

"Nothing... just practicing." I answered.

Gab seeing me doing embarrassing things like these made me uneasy.

I continued trying to come up with an idea to make sure Jane wouldn't get mad at me, but this time I made sure that I wouldn't blabber anything out loud. Every once in a while, I'd glance at Gab to make sure that I wasn't voicing my thoughts anymore. My quick glances slowly became blatant staring. My eyes lingered on his face: his perfect nose really attracted me the most. His green eyes were a good combination with his dark brown hair. My eyes shifted to the lower part of his face, and I found myself looking at his lips. Gosh! How could a boy have red and kissable lips like that? Honestly, this guy was making me feel insecure.

I checked myself out on the side mirror. My hair was a total mess! Well, after running at full speed, no wonder I looked like this. I tried to fix it with my fingers but stopped halfway... Since when did I feel conscious in front of a boy? I usually wanted boys to see me at my worst so they would stop hitting on me. Then why did I suddenly want to look better?

I glanced at Gab, his green eyes were focused on the driveway. As I stared at him, my cheeks wouldn't stop heating up. He probably noticed that I was looking at him because he abruptly spoke, startling me.

"What's wrong?"

I quickly turned my gaze to the driveway. How many times had I caught myself staring at him already? It was getting out of hand. In my mind, I was slapping my face  repeatedly to bring myself back to reality. Why did I always lose my mind everytime I looked at him?

"N-nothing." I muttered.

I focused on looking out the window to stop myself from staring at Gab.. so focused that I didn't notice that we had already arrived. All of sudden, my body went numb. I was about to back out but Gab tried to cheer me on.

"You can do it! You did it for her, after all."

His words always put me at ease. His voice always calmed me down. I didn't know why but everytime I was with him I always felt secure,  like he was my guardian angel.

Before getting out of the car, I gathered up all the courage to continue. I thanked Gab for driving me over and for accompanying me to the mall.

"Well, good luck to me." I muttered. I took a deep breath and stepped onto the sidewalk while Gab gave me an encouraging smile.

I was shaking, like, literally shaking. My hands and knees felt like jelly as I stood by the frontdoor of Jane's house. The anxiety was overwhelming; I felt like collapsing. The winter breeze wasn't helping either, sending chills down my spine. As much as I wanted Jane to come out immediately, part of me was hoping that she wasn't here.

After what seemed like forever, Jane finally showed up. I tried to look as calm as I could, but I probably failed since she immediately made a worried face.