Dalliance

Chapter Forty

"I never thought I would see you." Nicholas said as his attention focused solely upon Holly. She did everything she could to sway past him as he attempted to move closer to her.

"I am not here out of my decision..." She glared to Dawson.

"I am actually the one who desired to see you."

"I never thought you cared for me." He attempted to say with a joking tone but both Dawson and Holly stood with deadpanned expressions.

"Loathing is the correct word of my feelings for you. If up to me, I would end you here...but it is not."

"Why is that?"

"We want to take down the throne." Dawson said as he crossed his arms against his chest.

"And how can I help? I am more wanted then you."

"Your money-your alliances...your name."

"Ah...my title and my past is what you are going on."

"Money buys anything; drink, entertainment...women."

"Not all women." Nicholas's gaze flipped back to Holly as she was disgusted with the way he looked at her as if she had been a piece of cake.

"Any respectful woman makes a man work for her affection."

"And if it is lost then? How does he regain it?"

"The same way he earned it." She said in an aggravated manner before glaring at both men.

"But what can you do for me?"

"I can promise you'll live. Aside from that, I have nothing else you want..."

"You do have something..."

"She is not mine to give." Dawson said with a saddened look in his expression.

"What do you mean? Have the star crossed lovers finally realized that reality is no fairy tale?" He let out a crazy laugh-similar to the one he gave to Dawson when he visited him in the dungeon back at the castle.

"If you deny us the money, I will make it a point to carry you to the king himself if not the wild folk. We found them..."

His brow raised. "As did I." Nicholas then picked up his shirt to reveal a scar from his shoulder to his navel. "Ran before they could do more."

"What did you do to make them do that?"

"Stole a spear, something of that nature..."

"Regardless of your...proposition..." Nicholas continued. "I am certainly a dead man. By fever or sword...I want nothing but to experience my remaining days." As he spoke, he placed himself against a far wall and began coughing-until it then became a full on fit. Being knocked to the ground by his illness, a splat of blood fell from his lips and onto the ground between his hands.

"Not something to desire..." He looked to Holly as she suddenly felt guilt and shame for how she treated him. Although his evilness remained prominent in her mind, she could never turn away the sick or wounded-and therefore, agreed to care for him. They took him to an inn; the one farthest in the village, until he was resting comfortably. Holly constantly changed out the bandages upon his head until the fever had diminished to nothing.

He awoke in the middle of the night as she removed his final compress. Startling her, he snatched her hand.

"I am terribly sorry for my treating of you." He let out another cough-this one, gaining Dawson's attention as he was passing in the hall outside with a bucket of water for his own bathing. He remained in the hallway, listening to their conversation. "I know my words are late and my meaning useless to you, but before my last breaths are drawn, I wish you to know the truth."

Trying to ease him, she placed her hand on his cheek. "I can see your sincerity." As she bowed over him, her peripheral vision caught Dawson. She decided to make the most of her circumstances. "And perhaps one day, we can regain our friendship. I wish for you to regain your health..." She then kissed his forehead before going to enter the hall herself. She watched as Dawson was enraged and smirked at her small victory.

By the week's end, Nicholas had sent word to everyone possible to obtain their financial backing against the crown. Dawson was forced to watch Holly's affections lean towards Nicholas. For several days, he had not seen the attraction and realized she felt more connection to him then Dawson-as his betrayal had been truly sincere and Dawson's had not. In truth, Dawson was not sorry for what he had done, he was sorry on how everything turned out. He also knew if it would mean saving her, he would make the same choice without doubt.

"Can you boil these bandages?"

He gave her an agitated nod before holding out his palm.

"I believe his fever is gone, is it not?"

"His wound is infected. If it is not healed, he will certainly die."

"Perhaps I will not boil them then."

"Were you not the one who spoke of keeping him alive at any cost?"

"And were YOU not the one who loathed him until the ends of the Earth?"

"You have cornered me, Dawson. Given me no choice but to make what ever circumstances I encounter, the best for me. I can see in your eyes that you do not forgive me, but I can also see in his, that his apology is genuine."

"You are right! I do not apologize for protecting you, even if I had to deceive you to do it! I would make the same choices over and over again, if it meant you were alright!"

"But I was not! I was taken advantage of-ripped of my innocence by a man YOU made a deal with!"

"Yes...you are right about that...but I am not sorry for my method-I am sorry for the outcome."

"Regardless of your reasoning, it does not matter, you desired me to forgive you-and I had. I asked the same, and you were prepared to leave me in the middle of the woods!"

"No. I was walking ahead-I would never leave you with wolves."

"And yet, you made a deal with one."

Dawson glared to her, moving closer to her. "You have no right on feelings towards him. You were the one who saw something in him that was trusting. If him and I become allies...even more...you have no right to tell me anything. You ruined whatever hope you had, Dawson. I gave you my heart without care, and now I know that you will keep it-but only to keep harming me."

"I have risked everything and instead of appreciating this chance we have...you are giving one to him?"

"I can look to him and see something in his eyes-"

"Lust. It is lust for you, not love for what is best."

"And what is yours? Are you immune to lust, Dawson? If you claim to be, you are the most grand of the liars. No man is withdrawn from such a feeling."

"I lust for you, I admire you, I adore you, I care for you, I protect you, I love you...but it does not seem to matter what I feel or say or do or even think...perhaps you were right...Perhaps we fell in love with the idea of one another...because in this moment...I see a woman who is selling herself to the man who harmed her more than anyone."

"And I am standing in front of the man who allowed it to happen."