Dalliance

Chapter Fifty Three

Dawson gently stroked Holly's face as her expression appeared so peaceful. In his mind he apologized to her for committing the most ultimate betrayal. Feeling physically ill for the day, he tried to distract himself with the good news of possibly being able to have children. He closed his eyes and thought of a little child sharing features from both him and Holly running around, calling him "dad" and Holly, "mom", sitting by the pond, telling stories, and spoiling the child. But the as he just began to relax, his vision showed Vera, offset and smirking with a wicked smile. He jolted open as Holly had been watching him daze.

"What was it you were thinking of?"

"You, of course, my love." He reached down and gave her a sweet kiss as she sat up. He helped her before she rested her back.

"I had the most amazing dream of us having three beautiful children-two precious boys and a beautiful little girl. They protected her and we often took them to the most beautiful places in the villages; having them partake in festivals and they had never done anything but smile."

"I had a thought very similar." She gave a kind smile before he saw the physical deterioration of her miscarriage. "Do you require anything?"

"Water. Please."

"I will return quickly."

Moving in fast paces, he found his way into the kitchen and lingered towards the middle. Not that he never spoke to them, but the servants were not used to seeing the King in the kitchen-nor looking so distracted and pained. One of the younger females gently moved to his side, giving a curtsy before speaking to him.

"Is there anything you require, your highness?"

As he was blank, thinking of Vera and Holly, he had not heard her.

"Your highness?' Giving a kind pat on his arm, he snapped to her.

"WHAT?" Finding the kitchen to become increasingly quiet, he realized the extent of his volume. "My apologies...Just a pitcher of water...and a chalice."

A servant began to shake before giving him his request. "I hope you take my apology." He spoke before leaving the vicinity, the other servants continuing their jobs while whispering. Making it back to her room, he placed the water beside her and poured the water into the chalice before watching her finish all of its contents.

"Thank you."

He nodded as she withdrew a story from her side. The spine of the book had been deteriorating and the pages themselves had been torn and stained from years of existing, but-she held it with a large smile.

"How in all the kingdoms did you find that?' He asked with a wide grin, recalling the book.

"I had my most trusted soldiers track it for your birthday. You could not truly think I would have forgotten."

"I did not expect this. Holly, you should rest...and should not have done this."

"Do you not like it?"

"Are you mad?' He chuckled, pulling the book into view. "This was the first story Eleana had read to us. The night our parents were killed. She took it from a bookshelf and told us about a family forced to live in isolation from doing the right thing. They were forced to deal with the trials of life, but never broke their bond as family." He froze, the words speaking more personal then they ever had before.

"You should rest." He kissed her head as she slid back into bed. "I love this." He held the book to his chest as she slid herself underneath the covers and began to sleep. Seeing something pass near the window, he motioned to them and pulled open the drapes to reveal the garden ahead. Vera was walking alongside Nicholas, a smile wide on her face-before her gaze caught Dawson watching her. Unknowing to him at the time, he had been glaring-due to being deep in thought; something, she took entirely wrong.

Late night came and the servants had all rested for the night. The soldiers were upon their posts as Dawson paced in front of his room. Several torches lit the way, but nothing seemed to ease his racing mind or nauseous feeling. Just as he had begun to think of what to say to her, Vera moved towards his room. Now wearing a long white nightgown with a sheer fabric along the arms and a corset on her chest, she was an obvious temptress, but not one that he had interest in.

"I was hoping you would come to me."

"You were?" Her brow raised.

He nodded while pulling her into his room. Since Holly was asleep in the infirmary, they were allowed the entire room themselves.

"I wanted to speak to you about the night before last."

"Ah..." She smiled wide. "You had quite a lot to drink."

"Had anything else...taken place?"

She rose from the wall, excitement coming over her face.

"You mean...you do not remember?"

"I suppose not..."

"Would you like me to be descriptive?"

"No...I would not do such a thing to Holly...I love her."

"I thought the same...but you begged me to be with you...asking me my feelings for you. Then you told me how you loved me." She had her hands on his chest by this time, before he backed away.

"No." He said sternly. "I love Holly. I have no romantic feelings for you."

"Then why is it you were spying on my walk with your dear knight friend?"

"I saw you pass by the window."

"And the glare?"

"I was in deep thought."

"Of the night before last?"

"No. Of the guilt I feel for something I would never have done. I vow to never touch another drop of alcohol as long as I live."

"Dawson, you should not feel guilty. Love is-"

"I feel many things for you...but love is NOT one of them."

She stood back, genuinely shocked.

"What is it you feel for me then?"

"I felt pity. When you were taken of your innocence, I felt angry for you, protective-even sad...but now I feel...disgusted."

"Dawson-"

"You will not refer to me as that. I am your King...and even if something DID transpire between us...it will NEVER be known! I love Holly and nothing, and no one will change that." As Dawson turned with his honest words, he found Nicholas standing in the doorway, his jaw clenched and his hand on his sword. Although they did not speak, Dawson recognized the anger in Nicholas's eyes-but they moved as if polite strangers.

"May I escort you to your chambers?" Nicholas asked Vera as she nodded. Looking back to see Dawson truly fretting, he left him in place, disappearing down the hall with his potential future wife.