Glass~(jaspar)

Chapter 14

"Does it still hurt?" He asked. Joe rolled his eyes. "Yes, since the last time you asked three minutes ago, the pain has not stopped. How weird, am I right?" He joked, because joking was better than feeling, and with having been hit in the head by someone in the office, and having Caspar Lee between his legs taking care of him, he was feeling a lot.

Mostly, he felt sad. He had truly hoped this new job would be great. Zoe had promised him it would. She said they were all nice. But she was wrong.

Some people were more than nice, he thought, as he stared at Caspar, a hint of a smile dancing on his lips.

And some were less than friendly, he reminded himself as he thought of who, just who, could've wanted to hit him in the head with Tyler Okaley's stapler.

"Did I do something wrong?" He dared to ask Caspar. He knew it was a childish question, he knew Caspar's answer already, but he still needed to hear it. He needed that reassurance that he couldn't give himself.

He just hoped trusting Caspar this much wouldn't ruin him.

Caspar tended to ruin people, apparently.

"Yes," Caspar breathed, his eyes serious and his breathing uneven. "Yes you have, Joe," the young man stared at him feeling equal parts of disappointment and anger. "Oh really, care to elaborate there, Lee?" He asked.

Caspar smiled, taking away the ice package and setting it on the desk besides Joe. "You became the most good looking person at this building, and that used to  be me. That's why I thought throwing a stapler at your pretty face would get me my title back," he said, his eyes shinning and his hands pressed tightly against Joe's waist.

Joe smiled, a laugh escaping him and he rolled his eyes. "I was serious!" He chided. Caspar's laugh interrupted him. "So was I!"
He laughed, and for a second he forgot all about Joe knowing how he played people and forgot all about someone in the building being a danger to Joe and he just. Relished in the feeling of being this close to such a fantastic human being, and managing to make him laugh.

"You're the worst," Joe said. Caspar smiled. "I know," he answered.

Caspar would've very much liked to kiss Joe right there and then. But he knew he couldn't. He knew that if Joe was letting him act like his boyfriend right now it was only because he was shaken up by the stapler incident. Once the adrenaline wears off, Caspar thought, he'll remember what I've done and what I am, and he'll walk away.

Again.

"So, I'm gonna- ah- go and- um, finish this paperwork for ya', all right Joe?" Caspar proposed, dropping his hands to his sides and walking away from Joe, too aware that the wrong people at the office were watching them. Joe nodded slowly, poking rather confused.

Caspar thought that was nice. To be confused. If he was confused then he wasn't 100% aware of how bad Caspar truly is. He wasn't 100% aware of how much he'd fuck him up if given the chance.

Zoe had done well by trying to keep him away.

While he walked back to his and Joe's shared cubicle, he wondered if Dan would forgive him if he came clean. If maybe coming clean would make him feel better.

Maybe he owed Dan that much. But he still couldn't bring himself to do it. He couldn't bring himself to to speak aloud to his best friend about how he had purposely hurt him where it hurt. He was not a good enough person to do that.

I guess Caspar just wasn't the hero of his story.

Sometimes, in life, you have a hero to come and save you. Others, you have to save yourself. And sometimes, you have to accept that you're the villain. And not all villains get redeemed.

Sometimes, you aren't brace enough to redeem yourself.

Sometimes, redemption is far from your grip, and you've gotta accept that.

Not all of us get a happy ending. Not everyone is destined to be better and brighter and good.

And sometimes that's okay.

Sometimes you don't need to be a hero. After all, all good stories need a good villain.

So if in this story Caspar was a villain, then Joe was the hero. And one of them would inevitably kill the other.

Caspar wondered which one would die first, as he sat down at his desk, and began to work