don't think they know. ii

Twenty-three.

Zonnique

8:35pm

January 6th

Chris really irritates me and I'm so done with him. Of course I'm the blame for everything. He shot below the belt so I did the same. In all honesty I didn't sleep with August. I just wanted to make him feel bad how I did. I may have taken it too far but oh well. What more do I have to lose? Exactly. Since Kaden is gone I have nothing.

I opened the front door of my home and walked inside to the emptiness. No giggles. No yelling. No Kaden. I threw my bag on the couch, then walked into my kitchen. Times like this call for a pain reliever. I opened the cabinet then grabbed the bottle of vodka. I've been drinking since the day we buried him and I can't stop. I gulped down the hard liqour, hissing from that burning tingly feeling in my esophagus. "Damn.." The quietness of my house became unbearable. I went into the living room then put some music on. Show me by Kid Ink started playing getting me a bit loose.

"Ughhh why is chrisss on this song!? He's so stupid!" I giggled to myself, pouring more vodka in the shot glass. The more I drank the more I stopped thinking about all my issues. I changed the station on the radio and jumped up off the couch.

"I been draaaankin'! I been draaaankin'! I get filthy when that liquor get into me. I been thinking, I been thinking. Why can't I keep my fingers off ya baby? I want youuuuu!"

.

.

.

7:00am

KNOCK

KNOCK

KNOCK

I lifted my head up and then groaned loudly. What did I do last night? As my eyes wandered my once clean house, I cursed under my breath. That's what I get for drinking heavily. I must've had too much fun... I slowly got up off the living room floor and made my way to the front door. I opened it, scratching my hair in the process. August stood there with an annoyed look on his face. "Zonnique what the hell is wrong with ya girl?" He asked breathing deeply. "What are you talking about?" I muttered holding my stomach. I began feeling queasy. "You know you aren't suppose to be drinking.."  "How you know-" "You called me last night.. listen for yourself." August cut ne off holding up his phone allowing me to hear the voicemail.

"I fill the tub up half way, then ride it wifff my SURFBOARD! SURFBOARD! HAHAHA...wait what the fuck she mean she 'graining on that wood'?"

"August you ain't gotta call nobody baaaaack!"

"Oh okay well I'm going to blow ya voicemail up cause I love this shit! Haha.. oops I spilled my vodka!"

My eyes bulged out of my head listening to this nonsense. I act like a asswhole when I'm drinking. He stopped the recording and looked me up and down. "Yeah you're busted shawty." I sucked my teeth turning on my heels and allowing him to come inside. This is so embarrassing. August closed the front door walking through my messy living room. "I'll be right back, I need to get myself together." I ran upstairs to my room then hurried into the bathroom.

After throwing up for a hour I finally had the strength to take a shower and do my other hygiene essentials. I refreshed but my head was still hurting badly. I threw on some leggings and a old graphic tshirt along with red converse. As I combed my hair in the mirror, I couldn't help but stare at Kaden's pictures. "Good morning baby boy." I whispered to myself and kissed the photo.

I finished up then made my way back downstairs. The house was spotless. August walked back in from the kitchen and looked over at me. He's been such a great friend and he always looks out for me no matter what. I can say I have feelings for him but I'm not ready for any type of relationship or commitment. "Thank you so much Aug. I honestly don't know what I'd do without you man.."

He shrugged. "It's cool Pullins... but um why were drinking yesterday anyways?" I rubbed the back of my neck before chewing my lip nervously. I knew this was coming soon. "I went to visit Chris and shit just went south. Basically he told me I'm irresponsible or whatever, blaming me. So I went off and said some things..."

August nodded, raising his eyebrows. "What things?" Dammit boy. "I said.. we.. uh had... sex." I mumbled but he heard everything. He lifted my head and gave me that look. "Zonnique you're only hurting yourself. You gotta fucking with people's feelings on the real." I discreetly rolled my eyes and sighed. "I know but I really wanto move on with my life. I'm completely over him now."

"Yeah you say that now.." He said lowly causing me slap his arm playfully.

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Omfg I'm going bed man lol. Three updates in ONE day, y'all some lucky niggas. But um I only do this because I love you guys ;3

y'all was going IN on Zonnique. I died... lmfao

GOODNIGHT BABY'S!!! ♡♡