Lovenapped

Jas Is...

Leyla

"Raj?" I call after him as he storms from the house. He buzzes his car walking to the driver's door and yanking it open.

"Raj?" I stumble down the steps trying to catch up to him. I don't understand what's wrong with him? I mean everything was fine and we were so close to finally tying our bonds and then he had seen this Jas woman.

"Raj!" I yell as he slams his car door shut starting the engine. I race down the remaining steps and across the gravel pulling on the passenger's door before he has the chance to pull away. I slide onto the seat pulling the door shut and hastily putting my seat belt on see rage in Raj's eyes. I don't feel safe in his car right now but I know this is the only way I might be able to get him to open up to me.

"Raj?" I say quietly putting my hand on his forearm but he just snatches it away turning his head so he is looking out the window as he revs the engine impatiently. I feel like I've done something wrong, but I'm not entirely sure what.

"Get out," he grumbles still staring out the window. I don't understand what has just happened. One minute Raj was being so caring and nice and now all of a sudden he's just flipped.

"Nahin," I stumble in shock. I'm not going to leave him when he's like this. I mean if he is going to be driving home at speeds which melt my brain then I at least want to be with him. Maybe if I'm in the car he won't do anything stupid?

"I said get out!" He roars turning his face to look at me. His eyes are ablaze with anger, his nostrils flared and lips quivering with rage. I have never seen this emotion in Raj before. Not even when he was torturing me have I ever felt this scared to be around him. I feel like he is a savage animal and I am his prey.

"Nahin," I mumble in a shaky voice. I know Raj wouldn't hurt me... Would he? Suddenly Raj puts his foot on the accelerator jolting the car forward causing my neck to snap forwards then backwards at such speed. I clutch the back of my neck feeling shooting pains travelling up and down my back. He aims the car at the gates which are opening at a relaxed rate. I think we are going to crash through them so close my eyes praying he stops the car. I hear the rage in Raj's voice as he shouts profanities at the gates but doesn't slow down or brake. At the last minute I peek through my eyelids watching as we barely make it through the wrought iron gates and swing the car to the left making the back wheels skid along the road leaving black tires marks and the smell of burning rubber in the air.

"Raj please slow down," I feel my legs quaking in my shoes, my legs begin bouncing out of anxiety.

"I gave you the option to leave," he growls back pushing his foot further on the accelerator causing the car to lurch forward. I don't know what went so wrong. Who was that woman? Why has she had such an effect of Raj? What is he hiding?

"Please Raj... I'm scared," I can't hide my feelings much longer. Raj just laughs at this and presses onwards at speed not caring about me. I look at him. The Raj I have grown used to, the one who loves me, cares for me, is kind to me, the one who knows exactly how to kiss me, how to make me feel wanted, how to make me feel warm and fuzzy inside, has disappeared. This Raj who's sat next to me right now in the car looks and feels different. He is enraged, frightening, totally disregarding my feelings, it's like he is searching for something within himself that is some form of monster usually kept trapped and caged but somehow has been let out, like the woman in the bathroom was his key, his trigger. I close my eyes removing my hand from my neck as I lean back in my seat gripping the material clinging onto it for dear life. I close my eyes, scrunching them so I can only see black. If Raj wants to kill himself with his stupidity then he can kill me too. It's not like anyone will miss me and if Raj left me I'd miss him so much that I probably wouldn't see the point of living. He drives around, screeching his brakes, honking his horn, revving his engine for around an hour before he pulls into the driveway of his safe house and does an emergency stop causing the car to skid up the gravel. He kills the engine and lets out a long sigh before unbuckling his seat belt and opening the car door. I open my eyes, the edges of my vision being blurry from having my eyes scrunched for so long. My fingers feel stiff from gripping onto the seat for so long but what hurts the most is my heart. Why has Raj changed? I watch him slam the car door shut making the car rock like a Moses basket before he storms up the steps and flings the front door open. I slowly, with shaking hands, unbuckle my seat belt and carefully step from the car, my legs feeling weak. This car ride had been different from the one before. The one where Raj had wanted to hurt me because he couldn't deal with his love for me wasn't as frightening as this experience. It's like before Raj knew he didn't want to hurt me but now he just didn't care, like his heart has been frozen over again. I take each step one at a time feeling my legs wobble like jelly before I shuffle through the front door and shut it carefully behind me.