Catch me if you can [NARRY AU]

Chapter twenty-four

My massive headache woke me up, probably due to all the thinking I did last night. I looked at the time. 7 am. I got out of bed with a groan and slipped on some sweatpants and a shirt that looked clean. I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth, then went to my room to grab my presents. I didn't hear anyone yet, so I was probably the first one up. I sighed and walked downstairs, presents balancing in my arms. When I got there, I walked over to our horrible tree and placed the presents under it.

I waited for the rest to wake up, not caring about breakfast. I just wasn't hungry. I thought about Niall and the text from last night. Wondering if I got a response, I walked uptairs, remembering my phone was still on my nightstand. I didn't got one and shrugged, it didn't really matter. I stuffed my phone in the pocket of my sweats and walked downstairs for the second time that day. I knew the last tray cracked, so I stepped in it extra hard, hoping it might wake someone up. It didn't.

I sighed again. I wasn't feeling so Christmasy for some reason, but I didn't know what it was.
Oh who am I kidding, of course I knew why. Niall, that's why. I went to sit in front of the tree again, so my back was facing the stairs.

It's like I always missed him. Every atom of me missed him. Before, I didn't even know another human could feel something so strong. I knew people could hate each other so much, they could be capable of murder, I knew someone could be so sad they would commit suicide, but I never imagined love, could be the feeling I felt into my bones. I actually never knew what love was. Of course, I knew family love and friendly love, but not love. The media, I thought, was always exaggerating it. Movies, books, they al described love like something beautiful, yet deadly. And I never believed it could exist in such greatness. Yet here I was, feeling numb to everything cause I was in love. I was in love with a person who loved me too. I was in love with a person who loved me too, but it wasn't safe to love. And that was probably the hardest part. The fact that we could be together, but at the same time, we couldn't. The best cruelty. Niall was constantly on my mind. I didn't even did it on purpose. Why would I hurt myself in that way? No, thinking about Niall, was like breathing. I think thinking about Niall was part of the unconscious part of my body, like creating saliva or making sure my heart was beating. Niall was tattooed on my brain, under my skin, he was everywhere. It was patethic, knowing the lad not even two weeks straight, but that was the power he had over me already. Maybe we didn't even have to know each other that long. From the start, I knew it was going to be him I would give myself to, in every way. I knew I would share my spirit and body with him, I just knew it. And he did, too. I never actually tried to fight it, never told myself actually no, and when I did it, I knew I was lying to myself. I was incapable of staying away, and he knew. And now, I was forced to. I was gonna get killed, if 'they' knew Niall loved me. Not that I cared. I would die, to be with him. Extreme, I know, but I guess that was true love. Actually, no. True love. I don't know what that is. I don't think anybody knows what it is exactly. The media makes me think that true love is sharing your secrets and stuff like that, but that is friendship in my opinion. Love is different for anybody, so the definition of true love isn't right or wrong. Sure, you could not agree to every kind of love, but who were you to judge? No one. Just like the rest of us. We were no one, yet we thought we could judge what was right and what was wrong. That is just who humans are. Jay told me last night that Niall and I should be together. She judged on how it was supposed to be, before she knew that we want to, but we can't. Don't judge if you don't know.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I almost jumped, but calmed down when I heard Liam's voice.

"Are you alright, Harry? You don't look so good.' Thanks Liam, so subtle.

"Yeah, no I'm okay."

He nodded and came to sit next to me. I heard two pair of feet walk down the stairs, and I was glad everyone was up by now.