Catch me if you can [NARRY AU]

Chapter thrity-one

No.

No.

No.

Hell no.

It couldn't be him. I just couldn't. I felt my lunges squeezing together and the room suddenly became very small. I felt dizzy and I knew I was having an asthma attack. I started to breath in and out, but it became harder with the second and my lunges started to hurt very badly at this point. I threw of the face mask and leaned myself against the table where the body was laying. Luckily, Andrews caught on and rushed over to his desk to grab the medicine. He pushed it in my hands and I pumped it in my mouth. I felt my breathing slowly but surely turning to regular again and my lunges didn't burn as much.

Row raised his eyebrows and looked at us both as if we grew a dick on our foreheads. God, he was such and asshole.

"I guess it is him then?" He asked me in a monotone voice. I swear if I get out of here the first thing I do is making sure he gets fired.

"Doc, does this man have tattoos?" I asked Andrews, after I felt like speaking again. Yes, the guy laying here had dyed blonde hair and apparently he had blue eyes, but something was saying me it was not him. I was sure that that something was my heart, not wanting to believe I was losing him, but I wanted to be sure it wasn't him.

Doctor Andrews went trough his files again and I was praying to every god I knew it was not him. It simply couldn't be him. He couldn't be dead. He just... it couldn't.

"Yes, he has one on his calf." Andrews said, and I heard the disappointment in his voice. He was almost sure he was giving me the answer I didn't want to hear, because I tasted salt on my lips and I knew I was crying.

But of joy.

Niall had two tattoo sleves, it was not him. It. Was. Not. Him!

"It's not him! Doc, it's not him!" Before I could think I walked over to him and pulled him in a bone crushing hug. Suddenly I wasn't afraid of physical contact anymore, I just wanted to share my joy with everyone. I let him go and raced to the waiting area where Liam, Louis and Zayn were anxiously waiting for the news I just figured out. I saw them and began screaming. I didn't care who saw me, I needed them to know it wasn't him. He was not dead. He was still gone, but not dead, and I felt the pressure that I felt on my shoulders just a few moments ago disappear in thin air.

"Guys, it's not him! IT'S NOT HIM!" I kept chanting like a mantra. I saw Liam forcing Zayn in a hug and a wide smile appear on Louis' face. Zayn was crying, but I guessed it was of joy, and I was so happy. My tears hadn't stopped though, but I just let them go. For quite some time, I didn't allow myself to feel anything whatsoever, and I needed to let this out. I needed to cry, I needed to scream and I heard myself laughing again. They all three looked at me, happy they saw some emotion on my face, and Liam pulled me in a hug, and it felt so good. It felt so good to feel someone, to let it all out, to not feel numb. I had the urge to run a marathon, to swim to Africa and back, to dance with Miley Cyrus and to slap Row in the face, but decided against the latter because jail wasn't exactly the place to be for a gay guy like me.

I lifted Liam and spun him around, laughing like a mad man, but not like a maniac like I did when I was released from the hospital. I put him down after I got dizzy and went over to Louis to jump up and down with him. I even pulled Zayn into a hug, but I was just so happy. It was kinda weird because my heart was still broken with the thought of him not here, but I was just so glad he wasn't that body on the table. I felt sad for the dead guy's family though, but that was the last thing I thought about at this moment. I felt a piece of happiness, and I wasn't planning on letting that go anytime soon. Yes, he was still missing, and yes my heart was still broken inch by inch, and yes I couldn't even think about his name, but he was not dead. And I held on to that thought for dear life.