Instant | Harry Styles Fanfiction

Chapter 20

I grumbled as the sound of my alarm shook me and my room. I slammed my hand onto my phone shutting it off. The room was engulfed into silence, as last nights events replayed in slow motion in my mind. Guilt. Heartache. Were the two main emotions I felt, they coated my weak defenesless body. I rolled over slowly and sat up. I turned on my bedside lamp, which made me squint. After my eyes had adjusted to the light I picked up my phone and I had a message from Ari.

*Hey, how are you? x*

As I read the text, last night flashed through my mind again in shattered fragments, the date, the argument, the dream, the disaster. It was not the way I had hoped it would pan out. It took me a few moments to respond as I had been distracted by my memory.

*I am fine now, thank you for everything x*

I often felt bad for Ari and Rose because, after what had happened I was always ringing them up and crying to them. I used to never want to go out, I was such a shit friend, but never ever did they complain not once they stuck by me and supported me. They cheered me up and kept me company during my darkest hours and I couldn't have thanked them enough, I wouldn't have been able to cope with out them. They were my rock, they stopped me from breaking down, although on most occasions I did.

I pattered across my room and grabbed some clean underwear. As I passed the mirror I caught a glimpse of my reflection, I looked even worse than I did last night. I grabbed the underwear, turned off my lamp and headed out of my room and towards the bathroom. I entered the bathroom quietly, trying not to wake my family up. I turned the light on and set out my towels. My bathroom was always so warm, most winter nights I wanted to hibernate in there. I opened the shower door and turned it on, and closed the door letting the water heat up while I undressed.

I hoped into the shower and let the hot water caress my body. The water soothed me, not just physically but mentally. The steam allowed me to clear my head as I washed my hair, and my body. As I stepped out of the shower I felt calm and relaxed. I quickly dried myself and put my underwear on. I quickly walked to my bedroom as I didn't feel comfortable with being around my family in my underwear. I reached my room safely. I sat on my bed and checked the time, it was almost 7. I hadn't been too long in the shower.

I walked over to my wardrobe and pulled out a pair of jeans out and put them on. I then placed a simple grey jumper over the top. I dried my hair and straightened it, trying to make myself not look half dead, which was quite a task. My make up took a bit off time because the bags under my eyes made me look like I had been beaten up, by 7.45 I was ready. I grabbed my daily essentials and headed downstairs preparing myself for the wrath of my mother.

I had barley made it to the bottom of the stairs when my mother started yelling.

'WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU LAST NIGHT' she screamed.

'WE WERE WORRIED SICK, YOU DIDNT CALL OR TEXT' she shouted.

'You can't have been that worried because no one came after me' I spoke calmly.

She was speechless.

'Exactly' I spoke, feeling proud.

'That's not the point' she spoke in a raised voice.

'What is the point then mother, I am 18 remember mum, an ADULT, I can do what I like, I don't need your permission' I spoke, gritting my teeth, as anger boiled inside of me.

'WHERE WE YOU' she shouted.

'None of your business, but if it makes you feel better I was at Ari's happy now?' I spoke.

'Sa-'

'End of conversation' I spat, cutting her off.

I walked past her and the rest of my family and into the kitchen. I was all calm and relaxed and now my mother had wound me up as per usual. I couldn't wait till I moved out. I decided not to stay for breakfast and grabbed a cereal bar instead and headed out. I put on my maroon jacket, with my leather jacket on top. I pulled my ugg boots on to my feet, grabbed my bag and headed out the door without saying a word.

As I walked down the road to the tube station I found myself thinking about Harry and his life. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and tapped his name into google. I was amazed at how much came up. I found myself very fascinated. I started with basic knowledge like his birthday, age and basic One Direction facts, there was just so much. By the time I had reached the tube station I had a good knowledge and understanding of One Direction.

I bought my ticket and headed to my platform. Once on the platform I finished my research on One Direction and moved onto Harry. I knew a little bit about him, from the newspapers and Ari and Rose, but compared to google I knew nothing. I knew his personal and love life was portrayed in a very negative light in the papers and that every girl he was with he was suddenly dating. The tube arrived but I couldn't peel my eyes from the screen, so getting on he tube was a difficult task. I sat down on a seat, not looking up from my screen once, I was reading about everyone of Harry's 'relationships' and releasing how hurtful it must be to see the awful things people write about you.

After I had done my research and now knew a fair bit about Harry, his family life, private life and general random facts about him. I felt like one of the crazed fans who has to know everything, I only wanted some background information, but once I had started I couldn't stop, but I decided I had to, or I would look like a creepy stalker. I suddenly felt very sorry for Harry because his life was all over the internet for anyone and everybody to read about and judge. It didn't seem right or fair. I decided to take my research every further. I downloaded the new One Direction album Four. Before I had time to listen to it, it was my stop on the tube.

I got of the tube, and headed out the nearest exit and up to my university. I was greeted by my friends as I entered English Literature, a subject I was very passionate about. As I walked in, sir was sitting at his desk in a tartan shirt with the sleeves rolled up and a black tie, he was far too much of a distraction.

'I swear Mr Walker gets hotter every time I see him' I gasped.

'I know what you mean, speaking of seeing people how was your date last night?' she asked excitedly.

My heart sunk as the words left her lips, any question she could have asked any question, but obviously she had to ask that one.

'Yeah it was alright' I almost whispered.

'Really' she questioned, as she slid a newspaper across the table.

I saw Harry and I from last night across the page, with the 'mystery guy' again. These paparazzi were really starting to annoy me. I felt even more sorry for Harry and I hated these people even more. They take something and turn it into something completely different, a load of bullshit and hurt everyone in the process and don't give a shit.

'Yeah it was fine, but my brother picked me up that's all that happened, moving on' I spoke quickly.

'Ok, sorry' Kimberly spoke.

'So I was thinking we could go out one night this week, we haven't spent much time together lately' Josh spoke.

'Thats a great idea' Aaron spoke.

I mumbled something but I really wasn't paying attention I had zoned out, I was letting the anger of the newspaper eat away inside of me.

'I- I don't feel well' I stuttered.

'Oh' Kimberly spoke.

'You don't look too well, maybe you should head home' Josh suggested.

'I- I think I will' I stuttered.

'Sir, Sir I- I don't feel well, could I go home please' I mumbled.

'You do look quite sick, can you see how you feel in 5 minutes' Mr Walker spoke.

'Sir, I feel really dizzy' I stuttered.

'Ok, I hope you feel better soon Sam, and please read the next 3 chapters of The Great Gatsby' he spoke.

'Thank you, Sir' I spoke, grabbed my things and rushed out of the room.

As I got outside my head was spinning and my heart was pounding. I felt awful, even worse than I had when I woke up. There was only one thing I wanted to do, which was go to bed, but that was from what I had to do.