All We Know (Paul LaHote)

Chapter Eight

"Your dad won't be upset with you, it's easy to lose. You're a wolf." Paul promised. He was lying in bed with Jazmine sobbing into his chest.

"It's all I've got left of her," Jazmine whispered.

"Hey now, that's not true. Jazmine, do you realise that outside your immediate family I know more about your mother than anyone else and I never even met her?" Paul asked. Jazmine looked up with puffy eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"You're not sad because you lost the ring, it's because of the meaning of the ring. But it's not like your father will forget the wedding just because he can't see the ring. You have something more valuable than any material item. You've got memories." Paul ran his fingers through Jazmine's hair and listened to her breathing calm down.

"When I first met you we were six and I had gotten in trouble for punching some kid in class. You offered me your cookie because I didn't get one and I was so shocked. People weren't usually nice to me." Paul admitted and Jazmine looked up at him.

"I don't remember that." She frowned.

"That's because it was no big deal for you to be nice. It was a huge deal to me." Paul shrugged.

"The next memory I have of you is when we were eleven and you beat up that kid who was picking on Jake and I was amazed at the temper you held." Jazmine was content to just let Paul talk.

"Then when your mother died I remember how you stopped coming to school most days and over the summer it was like you had disappeared. I visited your mother's grave, I don't know why but I did."

"I came home late that night after sitting at your mother's grave for hours and my dad nearly killed me. He had a grip on my throat and I thought this is it, I'm going to die. I wasn't scared." Paul stared at the ceiling and ignored the tear that ran from his eye to disappear into his hairline.

"That Summer my mother and I took Sarah and we stayed in Seattle just so we could have a normal holiday. Sarah didn't understand at the time but it was the best Summer I had up until then." Jazmine had begun running her fingers up and down Paul's arm to stop hers from shaking.

"When we came back you were back but you were different. You hadn't lost your light exactly, it just didn't shine as bright. That scared me because over the years my mother had lost her light the same way. I didn't want that for you."

"Then we went back to school and my temper had gotten so bad and I knew I was making a name for myself. I was getting like my dad but things were so bad at home and my grades were bombing. All I had was Jared and football." Paul paused for a second a cleared his throat. He didn't bother wiping his face because the story got worse before it got better.

"I spent weeks coming up to my fifteenth birthday just practising football constantly. Pushed myself harder than anything but I still couldn't kill the energy that burned inside of me every time thought of my father and I was so mad all the time. Mad at school, my dad and even my mom."

"The last one surprised me but I was so pissed at her for not leaving. What normal fourteen years old gets beaten to a pulp at least twice a week by his own father? She had given me that life and I hated it. But everything changed the time I raised my hand to her and she flinched from me. I nearly hit her. The sick part was that my father was going to let me." Paul took a deep breath and Jazmine reached up with shaking hands to wipe his tears away. She didn't interrupt, she knew he had more to say.

"I ran away that night and for some reason, I ended up sitting at your mother's grave. I asked her all the stupid questions that were stuck in my head and I nearly shit myself when your dad comes up behind me and grabbed my shoulder. This was the first time I had seen him in his chair since the accident. I had heard he didn't leave his house much."

"He answered most my questions. I spent hours talking to your dad and then I helped him back to the house and we never talked about it again. He didn't ask why I was there and I appreciated that. Too many adults tried to help me over the years and only made things worse for me."

"Then we went back to school and I was fifteen with a fresh attitude towards the world. I began studying and one day in the library I met you. I remembered but you didn't, I practically had to introduce myself." Jazmine huffed a laugh at Paul's dramatics. So maybe she had thought his name was Peter, it wasn't her fault.

"We grew close and you helped me where I was struggling and I couldn't help but kiss you in the same spot in the library two months later. I had just aced a Spanish test thanks to you." He laughed and finally looked down to make eye contact with Jazmine.

"My dad left two weeks later, only leaving me with a sprained wrist and two broken ribs and even though I was crushed you didn't ask. You just taped me up and kissed me and honestly, you were all I needed, right when I needed it." Paul promised and leant down to kiss Jazmine softly. She was crying herself now but she smiled through the kiss and pulled away.

"I fucking love you." She laughed and pulled him into another kiss. He laughed and pulled her closer before sighing happily.

"I'm a firm believer in destiny and I know that you were the Spirit's gift for such a shitty life."