❝Slice of Heaven Pizzeria, carry out or delivery?❞
❝D-de-delivery.❞
❝What would you like this evening?❞
❝A large p-pepperoni penis.❞
❝...❞
❝...❞
❝I don't know about the pepperoni part but I can sure get you everything else.❞
-----
In wh...
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Blue- Italics Gabe- Bold
"Sl--"
"[deep breath] What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands.Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo."
"...is...is this...Blue?"
"Uh...uhm...this isn't...Oliver?"
"This is Gabe from Slice of Heaven Pizzeria..."
"Shit man I have Oliver right next to the number for Pizza."
"That guy must be a lot like what you were trying to order last night."
"...a pizza?"
"A huge dick."
"Well, you're not wrong Gabby. He kinda cheated on me...and tried to make it seem like the girls hair just got stuck on his button. I may be an idiot but I am not stupid."
"Did you just call me--oh god why."
"Cause your name is Gabriel and you talk a lot. "
"You called me?"
"You work at a pizza place."
"Well, are you actually going to order pizza?"
"Touché."
"Man, that guy was an idiot to let such a precious jewel like you go."
"Oh, stop, you're making me blush."
"Who would ever cheat on a girl as nice as you?"
"Are you being sarcastic? I will not hesitate to drive over there and punch you."
"Please do I'm soooooo bored. I think being punched in the face might make me feel better."
"Maybe you should try doing your job."
"You called me."
"Oh, yeah, you're right...okay so I'll hang up now."
