The Book Of Beautiful Souls

Gilli_love12

The Story of @Gilli_love12

My name is Gillian. I am almost 13 years old and so far this is my story.

My life has never been easy. Its always been rough. Most people see me as this joyful girl who always smiles but sometimes that's not true.

When I was younger, my parents would fight a lot and terrible things would be said, but no one ever knew about that. I was about 6-8 when that happened. I also need to say I have an older brother and younger sister.

Things eventually got a little better, because my dad would go out of town and only come home on the weekends and my mom is disabled so she couldn't do a lot.
My dad also had a drinking problem back then.

All my life I have been called names and have been made fun of because my hair is strawberry blonde or orange. [A/N: THAT'S FUCKING AWESOME! I WANT HAIR LIKE THAT!]

In 4th grade I met a girl named Rebecca. She was shy but the most sweetest girl ever and we ended up being best friends. Finally 5th grade came around and I had another friend named Ashley and then another friend named Shelby came along.

We got in arguments all the time and even though Rebecca was supposed to be my best friend she always chose Ashley and Shelby, where I always became the one to be blamed for everything. It got to the point where I would say hi to somebody and they would hear rumors about me and would not talk to me.

I also had a crush and his name was Marcell. I was head over heels for him. I would do anything for him, we talked all the time and I actually thought I had a chance with him.

Then 6th grade came and Shelby found a new best friend. Ashley was kinda with me and Rebeca but not entirely.

Marcell had called me names and they hurt, they tore me down, and I couldn't eat for about 2 days.

I had always fought for Rebecca, always. I never gave up on our friendship but then she met Bethany and this was like 1 week after my birthday. She and Bethany became best friends and it killed me. I cried and still cry so much, I had lost hope and fell into depression. I had no one and I felt so alone. No one ever knew I was sad and still no one does.

I soon began to cut. I had 4 cuts from one night and they hurt like hell too, so don't do it.

My parents began to argue again. They would yell constantly and it hurts to know that they don't wanna be together and only are gonna be together till my brother or I turn 18.

❇❇❇

ThePsychMadHatter: There was more, but we never spoke again.

Gillian, if you are reading this, just know that you're not alone. We're all here for you, because we know what it feels like to be alone. To have no one to talk to, to have no one to trust, to have been backstabbed by people you once deeply cared for.

Now you're getting the chance. You all are. You're all getting the chance, to have someone who will care for you and will not judge you. Take it. Don't think that maybe if you died the world will have one less broken soul. That's not true. If you leave, the goodness will leave too.

We all are fighting our demons. And I admit, they are strong, and that's why we shouldn't fight with only our heart, but with our brains. If your demons stab you in the heart and twist the knife, smile, because they want you to see you in pain and you are better than that. If you give in, they're going to destroy you.

Give us the change to be your Angel, to be your rock, to be the ones you trust. We all need a shoulder to cry on, and we're all here and we all know, that together, we can go through this Hell.

❤ Stay Strong ❤