How Long Will I Love You

Seven

SEVEN

Judy corners me one day after class. Her best friends stand off to the side, sniggering at me and swearing at me whenever I glance at them. I swallow.

I hate these bitches.

I focus on Judy, her dark blue eyes are narrowed and staring at me harshly, silently judging my huge jumper and see-through leggings and scruffy converse. Her pink lips purse at me, smirking because she knows she’s better than me. She’s so supercilious.

“Hello.” Judy mutters, her soft voice coming out with a cold edge.

“What do you want?” I sigh, getting straight to the point. I never knew why she resented me so much, but the feeling’s mutual. I hate her. And I hate that she’s taken my best friend away. And I hate all the rumours she spreads about me and the names she calls me and all the smirking and glaring and laughing.

I hate her whole existence.

“I just decided to come speak to my boyfriend’s best friend. Is that so wrong?” she flutters her eyelashes innocently. I snarl at her.

“Fuck off.” I shove past her but she grabs my wrist and spins me around to face her again. She’s glaring at me angrily now. It would be so much easier to hate her if she wasn’t so pretty and perfect, and a nice person in general… to everyone else.

“Listen whore, and don’t ever speak to me like that. Your little best friend won’t like it. Trust me.” her eyes gleam mischievously; she knows she won. I can’t count the times he’s been angry at me from all the lies she feeds him, saying I called her a name or shoved her.

It’s stupid but she seems to get a thrill from it.

She disgusts me but I instantly shut up. I can’t bear it when he’s mad at me. She knows that.

He always takes her side anyway. He never seems to be there for me anymore. He doesn’t know the times I’ve laid in bed and wished he loved me and spoke about me the way he does about Judy. He just doesn’t understand and it kills me inside to know I’m losing him.

“What is it Judy?” I ask her calmly, wanting this ‘meeting’ to be over.

“I want you to stay away from him.” She eventually says, after an intense minute of silence and nothing but staring angrily into each other’s eyes. My eyes widen and I guffaw.

“Are you mental?” I laugh, shaking my head at her. Her eyes narrow at me.

“He’s my boyfriend you cow, you have to respect that.”

“Okay, seriously- is there something wrong with you?”

“You’re a fucking bitch.”

“If I’m that then I wonder what the hell you are.” I shout at her then gasp as her palm comes in contact with my cheek.

“He’s my fucking boyfriend. You’re not good enough for him and you never see him begging to hang around with you anyway.” She snarls, and her words are like a hot knife; it’s the truth.

“You need to get your priorities sorted Judy. You crazy bitch whore.” She smiles sardonically.

“You’re just jealous. I hate you and for that reason I don’t want you hanging around with him, so just leave. You’re embarrassing yourself.” She shakes her head and steps away from me.

“I really hate you Judy. Sometimes I wish you were dead.” It’s immature and a low blow but I can’t help it from coming out. I want to hurt her, what she’s so good at doing to me. She remains emotionless and just smirks, shrugging.

“What are you? Five?”

“Judy let’s go.” A voice from behind me says. From the icy tone I can tell he’s not happy. I wonder how much he heard. Judy grins at him then looks into my eyes again and smiles even wider. I know he heard me say I wanted her dead.

He’s going to hate me. I bite my lip and look down at the ground, furiously blinking back tears. I can’t cry, I won’t. But I can’t lose him either. Judy skips away and I hear them muttering to each other and then the door slam closed behind me. I almost start to hope he’s standing behind me, ready to take my side but that’s wishful thinking.

I wish he was still my best friend. But he’s never around anymore.

He always did this. He always hurts me.

But I still loved him.

*****