this part two... from i'm sorry with wroetomd.
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Please bring some tissues because we are going deep into your souls and we are going to make you cry.
Chris's POV~
I was standing by Harry's grave again, like i have done for the past 3 days. Something is always urging me to go there and when i do, i always pour my heavy grieving soul.
"Hi, Harry! I'm back again for the fourth day. I know it's been a year but I miss you so much baby. I just-i just can't do this anymore. It hurts knowing that you aren't around anymore. i hardly ever smile now, i lost all the happiness in me. I-" I stopped as i felt the tears rolling.
I sat down beside his grave as i spoke to it.
"How could you be so damn selfish? You had people that loved you including me but i guess i can't blame you. When it all gets too much, you kinda lose yourself. When i saw you laying in the coffin, i saw how pale you were, i saw the cuts on your arm and how they have finished bleeding. i remember kissing your lips for the last time before breaking down in front of everybody. My mother felt sorry for me, she loves you a lot Harry. She treats you like her own son, you was perfect to me even though you have been fighting with your mind. My mother knows that i am depressed, she knows when i'm having a bad day but all she does now is hug me. She hugs me till i start crying because she knows i am hurting inside." I said struggling to keep myself calm. The tears just keeps falling like i haven't cried for one whole year.
"Are you resting happily up there? Are you a whole new person?" I said as i placed the flowers around his grave and smiled as I felt my soul clearing.
"I know you are around and looking down onto me from above. I just hope you are happy and resting with no troubles. I hope that one day, you'll open the gates for me when my time comes. I love you so much, Harry! I love you so much, my beautiful boyfriend... Fly high and reach for the sky." I said smiling with more tears falling.
"Rest well, Harry!" I said as i blew a kiss to his grave and left it peacefully.
I walked home with tears staining my face, i unlocked the door and i go to look for my mother. I see her in the garden sitting on the hammock enjoying the blazing sun that was beaming down her.
"Hi, mum!" I smiled at her.
She looks at me and gets up to hug me as she saw my tear stained face.
"Are you okay, darling?" She asks.
"I'm okay, i just went to see Harry today." I said as i tried to hold the tears in.
"Ah dear, let those tears fall! It's okay to cry." My mother said.
I took a deep breath to fight the tears but i couldn't, my soul needed to pour itself.
"Mum, i miss him so much! I can't do this anymore, I can't be strong anymore. I find it hard to sleep at night knowing that he gave up his own life in my bedroom, everyone is telling me to move on but i can't. I just want to hold him one last time. I want to cuddle next to him, i'm scared to leave the house because everywhere i go, it reminds me off, Harry. It's been a year since he's passed but it feels like it was yesterday that we buried him." I cried as mother held me tightly, she saw the pain in my eyes.
