Chasing Cars

Chapter Thirty

   You know how sometimes you stand up too fast after sitting for a really long time and you feel nauseous and get these black dots all over your vision? That was me all morning. The calendar read April eleventh, and though my friends gave me multiple items of food, the doctor's instructions were to not eat anything for twenty-four hours before surgery. The lack of food was definitely taking its toll on me. I was starving. And I'm an extreme stress-eater. I was starving, stressed, and unable to eat any food. Last time I ate anything was when Krystine, Andrew, and were eating disgusting hospital tacos at three in the morning almost thirty hours prior to then. I needed food. Badly.

"FOOD!" I screeched, hiding under a pillow to stop smelling food in my kitchen. "Quit being dramatic!" Evan called. I huffed. Evan was taking me to the hospital in two hours and I didn't know if I could even survive that long. He was making pizza rolls and the smell was all over the house. "Can't I just have one cheese-it? No one will ever know!" I tried to reason with Evan, but had no luck.

He only laughed and shoved six pizza rolls into his mouth as he entered my living room. "Sorry Keref. No foo fo you," he tried to say around the mouthful of pizza roll. I glared at him and turned away. He laughed at me and in return I hurled a pillow at him. "Can we leave early? You and the food are driving me insane," I asked, going from whiny to dead serious. Swallowing his pizza rolls, Evan nodded, "Sure we can go now."

We found Krystine in the waiting room, reading a book with an ugly yellow cover. "Hey guys!" She smiled when we sat beside her. She looked nervous, but she was doing a good job of hiding it. "I'm going to go find food," Evan said before heading toward the cafeteria. I turned to Krystine. "Why are you here so early?" I asked with a tired yawn. "Oh I was just visiting Andrew and thought there was no point in leaving, only to come back later," she shrugged, flipping the page on her book. "Did you know the police found out who killed Lexi?" She asked, suddenly looking excited. "No! Who was it?" I replied, eager to know.

"It was Chuck. He got mad at her and forced her to call people to 'apologize' or whatever, then he shot her!" She exclaimed, using her hands to motion out what she was saying. I would never have guessed Chuck as the killer. He liked to act all high and mighty, when really I could probably beat him unconscious with my wheelchair. He was annoying, but certainly not a killer. "How do you know it was him?" I asked curiously, unsure if this was just a rumor Krystine had picked up or the truth. "His fingerprints were found on the gun."

Trying to imagine Chuck shooting Lexi was hard, but the more I thought about it the more it didn't seem to be all that strange. He always had a gun on him, after all. And it explained the phone call I'd received from her as well. Strange how Chuck had made her call me when he's always been more awful to me than her. Then I found myself feeling bad for Lexi. I never particularly enjoyed her presence, but nobody deserved to be murdered. It was a completely unfair and cruel way to go.

"Kaaaaarevvvvvvvv!" I felt a poke on my shoulder, jolting me from my thoughts. Though I wasn't in the mood for long conversations, I'm not one who likes to disappoint, so I looked up and came face to face with Cam. "Cam, my man," I joked half-heartedly, low-key really happy that he showed up. Having always been able to read my emotions like a book, Cam sensed my unwillingness for small talk and kept it short. "Good luck in there! I know you'll do amazing and we'll all be here to help you when it's done!" He grinned, giving me a hug. Now that the surgery was here and about to happen, I was scared out of my mind. I'd never really taken too much time to think deeply about dying. It was never a plan of mine; I'd always imagined I'd die when I was old and wearing diapers or something. When I'd scheduled the operation the first time, I only imagined walking again just to spite my principal.

But she was dead now, and there wasn't a whole lot to hold on to. Once the doctors came for me, there would be no turning back. No do-over's or reset buttons. Either I'd leave with the doctors and end up in a morgue, or I'd come back with the ability to walk again. Both possibilities seemed so far out of reach, I began to question if this was all real or just a dream. I knew I didn't want to die. The thought of me being no more than a memory sent fresh waves of fear through my head.

"Kay, wake up," Cam called and snapped his fingers in my face. With a swift shake of my head, I blinked and apologized. "Can you stop?" I laughed when my friend continued the snapping. In my moment of spacing out, more people had shown up. There was Cam, Krys, and I, but Krystine's parents had shown up, which gave me a little confidence, as they were like a second family to me. Evan had returned from the cafeteria, and I was surprised to see him talking to Annoying Devyn from science. Even Andrew had turned up, though I didn't know how.

"So, what do you think?" I asked when I rolled up to him. "You know, the wheelchair life. Is the air better up higher or down here?" I joked. Andrew slowly closed the book he was reading and pondered my question for a minute, looking deep in thought. "Hmmm, probably up there. Little kids breathe down here, and little kids are sticky," he answered, leaning back in his chair with a satisfied grin. "True, good thing I plan on going up again soon. Hey, what are you doing in a wheelchair anyway?" I guess I'd assumed that if he woke up, he would be perfectly fine. The question was incredibly dumb, but I'd already asked so there was no going back on that one. "Hospital policy," Andrew answered. "I wasn't allowed to leave the room unless I was in one of these, but I doubt I'd be able to walk anyway. Something about having a ceiling fall on you, you know? But I had to see you before you went in for surgery! I mean, this is a big deal!" He exclaimed.

"What a sacrifice. You got in a wheelchair just to see me! What a quality guy," I joked, all traces of my previous bad mood, gone. "Yeah, you owe me," he responded with a choking laugh noise. Everyone near us turned and gave Andrew a weird look, but when they remembered his accident they awkwardly looked away, as if he couldn't see them. Thankfully, he just laughed and continued talking.

For the next hour, everyone wished me good luck on my surgery and told me they'd be here when I got out. Amy had shown up at some point, and though I disliked her, I was thankful for her thinking of me enough to come. "I hope I see you again, Karev Grey!" She shouted loudly, even though I was right next to her. Honestly, who says "I hope to see you again" when you're going into a surgery like this one? Once again, everyone in the room turned to give weird stares.

I opened my mouth to say something, but before I could get the words out, a nurse shouted from the end of a dimly lit hallway. "Karev Grey!" She called, searching around the room. "Um... here!" I called back nervously, locking eyes with Krystine and giving her a terrified look. She gave me two thumbs up and smiled in return. "Good luck," she said, giving me a hug before stepping back. "Kill it, Karev!" Cam smiled. "Gooo Karev! Go Karev, go!" Amy cheered. I cringed. "You'll do fine," Andrew smiled, giving me thumbs up as well. "I promise I'll still be here when you're done! Just promise you won't die, cause I didn't die so neither can you," he laughed nervously. "I won't die, I promise," I replied. And with that, I followed the nurse into what would either be a brand new beginning or the very end.

________________

Killing you all through Andrew so I don't get the blame.

But dang you got Amy the cheerleader *extreme cringe*