Entanglement

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Dan POV

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I didn't fall asleep that night.

Maybe I should have felt calm; Phil's body was soft against mine, his arms wrapped tightly around me while he breathed quietly, his mouth slightly open where it rested against my neck. He was warm and firm, steady and safe. Everything that I needed, especially right now.

Around an hour after his breathing had evened out, I'd brought my hand down to trail my fingers down his arms, latched around my torso as if even in his sleep, he didn't want to let me go.

Sleeping with Phil was calming, of course, I felt more relaxed and loved than I'd ever thought I could feel. Yet on this night, I couldn't get my eyes to shut; every sound I heard outside caused my breath to catch and my skin to crawl. It was my own fault, since Phil was right, and I shouldn't have been there. The angels were planning for tomorrow, and it was shocking that I hadn't been found out already. It was fortunate that Phil believed my lie about getting past the gates, because otherwise, he would have been even more angry. He most likely would have made me go home.

It had been hard to admit how scared I was. How my hands shook at the idea of leading a group of demons into war. How my head pounded at the thought of Phil being hurt. How my legs trembled at the possibility of our relationship being exposed by either of our actions.

Neither Tyler nor I wanted a war, but we knew there was nothing we could do to convince Korey to stop. I tried to ask the demon what they had both meant by 'it was going to happen anyway', but he had just waved me off. That had only made my stress worse.

Tyler knew something, and so did Korey. They both knew something that nobody else had any idea about. It explained Tyler's riddled words and how hesitant Korey had been around me when we'd first met.

The problem was that I couldn't just go up to him and ask. And that was why I had to go through each day with my nerves on edge, knowing there was some sort of explanation for everything I'd gone through, but not being able to find out what it was.

Tomorrow would be terrible. In my nearly nineteen years of being dead, I'd been through many wars, and yet this one was different. It felt different, and everything about it felt off. Especially since I didn't like killing or fighting anymore, the fact that I had to, if Phil's plan didn't work out, that was, made me feel sick. Especially since Heaven and Hell's populations and power had grown exponentially in the past year, meaning the battle would be much worse than any before.

Maybe if I was a normal demon living a normal, mean, burning life, then it wouldn't matter. But the fact was that I wasn't any normal demon. I was Dan, as Phil had told me many times before, and I had my own thoughts and emotions and reasonings. I wasn't bad.

And yet I was.

I finally shut my eyes at around midnight, trying to get the thoughts flying around in my head to slow down. My focus went back to Phil's arms wrapped around me, and the comfort I felt. I tried to convince myself that I would not lose this comfort tomorrow. That everything would turn out okay, once tomorrow or however long this would last was over.

At three in the morning, I understood that I had to head home. I didn't know what time the angels were going to wake up in order to prepare, and it would be way too risky to try and teleport out of here while any of them were out of their homes. In fact, with the war beginning, the angels would believe I was there to either spy on them or infiltrate into battle early. The consequence for being here at night was already death, and I wondered what would be done to me in this situation.