Entanglement

realize

Phil POV

-

Morning was near.

The soft mattress of my bed was barely any comfort at all. I was drowning in the bedsheets that still smelled like him, drowning in my clothes that he had just touched, drowning in my thoughts that were occupied with only his eyes and his mouth and him.

My brain could not comprehend that he was gone. Neither could my body, really, as my hands refused to function and my legs were numb as they splayed out on the bed.

Somehow, I had made it to my house; I had left the grey building with my wings dragging on the floor behind me, my face frozen in place with dried tears, pulsing trembles finding my body every so often. The world outside had been dark- around midnight. I had been in there for a few hours.

I didn't know what would happen with the war, and I didn't care. I assumed some sort of break had occurred, since no one was outside fighting into the night. It felt like everyone had disappeared and I was alone. Like I would be alone in the darkness for eternity.

Korey and Louise and Alfie and Zoe didn't matter to me at that moment. All that mattered to me was laying in my bed, inhaling the scent of a sleeping Dan, convincing myself that he was only away. He was just absent from here, asleep somewhere else. I would see him soon.

The pure denial physically hurt me.

Truth would come soon enough. It would come with the sun rising above the clouds, promising a new day, because the world didn't care when someone lost the opportunity to see it. It went on anyway, humans still breathed, birds still flew, rain still fell, everything went on, except for the one lost and those in the wake of the tragedy. It wasn't fair.

Dan had deserved to see every future sunrise and every future sunset. He had deserved to fall asleep on the ground of the Earth and feel the wind against his hair. He had deserved to witness the good things in the world because of all of the horrible things that had been given to him.

He hadn't deserved to lose his life because of an occurrence out of his control. He hadn't.

Tears found my eyes again. They fell down my red face, onto the pillow I was breathing against, reminding me of my own heartbreak. I wanted to punch something, hit anything, scream at the top of my lungs. But all I could do was stare at my dark surroundings feeling hollow and numb.

An hour later, I heard my door open.

I didn't move, though. I remained in the same spot, not really caring about who may be coming into my house. I heard footsteps move to stand next to the side of my bed, and then weight at the edge of it.

I couldn't even begin to wonder who it was; I just waited for them to speak.

Finally, a familiar voice rang out into the silence of the room. "You can't stay here forever."

Tyler, my mind informed me. His voice sounded strained.

"I can," I replied, uncaring. I was sure Tyler knew by now that I was the reason Dan had grown good, and I was sure that he knew we had been closer than we should have been.

A sigh came from the demon, but I continued to stare at my pillow. After a few seconds, he spoke again. "I know everything," He began, and that caused me to flip my head around, narrowing my eyes in his direction. Before I could ask what exactly everything was, he continued, the words coming out in a tired tone. "I know that you and Dan were in a relationship. I know that he made you worse and you made him better. I know that you loved him-"

"Love," I interrupted. "I love him. Not past tense." I inhaled deeply. "But how? How do you know?"

"I have some explaining to do," He replied shakily. "A lot of explaining, actually. But that's only if you're willing to listen."