Unusual Reality: Only Half A Blue Sky (One Direction FF)

Chapter 9 - Depression

Zayn's P.O.V

"What's your fault?" Anna asked me, gripping her clipboard and pen.

"None of your business," I spat back.

"Zayn, please, you have to open up to me, for me to help you," she said, patiently. 

"I don't need help! Why don't you get that?!" I exclaimed.

"Calm down," she soothed, "Zayn, you've got depression, and I can only help you if you explain everything to me." 

"And what if I don't want to?" I hissed.

"I can't force you, but you have to understand that you need help, and I'm willing to give it to you," Anna explained. I stayed silent.

"If you want, you can write your feelings down? I'll leave you some paper and a pen. I'll be back tomorrow." She stood up, laid the pen and paper on a table next to my bed and exited the room.

I laid down in bed and stared up at the ceiling. I pressed the button by the headboard, which turned the lights off. I must have fallen asleep, while I was deep in thought.

Harry's P.O.V

Anna came back out of the room and kindly told us, "It seems like Zayn is going to sleep, so I suggest you go home."

"Please can you help him? He doesn't deserve to feel this way," Niall pleaded.

Anna nodded. "I will try my very best."

"Thank you," Louis said. We were being driven home, when somebody's phone vibrated.

"Oh, it's mine!" Liam announced and looked at the Caller ID, "It's Simon." He held his phone in the middle of all of us and set it on speaker phone.

"Hello boys," Simon greeted. 

"Hi," we mumbled in unison.

"OK, I just wanted to remind you of the tour, which will start next week."

"What?! But I thought it would be delayed because of the current circumstances?!" Liam exclaimed.

"Yes, but then people would want reasons as to why the tour is delayed, and how would we reply? We want to show everybody that everything is normal," Simon explained, "And we don't want to raise suspicions."

"And how is that fair on Zayn? We've lied to the media loads of times, we can easily pull this one off! At least let Zayn have a say!" Louis yelled. 

"I will call him tomorrow." Simon hung up.

Zayn's P.O.V

The next day came by quick. A nurse gave me a breakfast of toast, tea, orange juice and an apple. I took a bite of the apple and drank the tea. I felt quite tired and the tea woke me up a little bit. The nurse came back in after about twenty minutes and stared at me in confusion.

"Aren't you going to eat?" she questioned, seeming genuinely concerned. I shook my head.

"I'm done," I replied bluntly. She took the tray and exited the room.

I stared at the piece of paper and pen blankly, not knowing if I should write something or not. I still couldn't handle the fact that I was actually depressed. Maybe they just got their facts wrong. Yeah, that must have been it. 

I sighed before getting out of bed, slipping a T-shirt on and sat on the chair in front of the table with the pen and paper. I started to write. All Anna was trying to do was help me, and, even though I didn't need it, I didn't want to make her job harder by not cooperating with her.

'Ever since Zara died, I've felt guilty, because she saved me. She would have been alive if I took the bullet instead. I feel angry, so angry, at Ibrahim because it was all his fault. But, if I follow everything back correctly, sometimes it feels like it's my fault. I wanted to die because I couldn't handle the pain of life without Zara. Also, I thought Perrie broke up with me because she didn't like me so I must have been doing something wrong.' I stopped writing, and stared at the paper. I shook my head from side to side and scribbled out the last sentence before continuing. 'Then I started thinking that the boys don't like me so maybe it would be better if I was gone.'

I sat back on my bed and crossed my legs, propping my elbows on my thighs and cupping my chin. I stayed there for a quarter of an hour, thinking about everything. A knock on the door brought me back to my senses and my eyes shot up to the door. Anna opened the door, and revealed my four best friends. The sympathy in their eyes showed that they actually cared about me. Maybe they did like me for who I was.

"You have some visitors," Anna stated, holding the door open while the boys flooded into the room. 

Before she left, I called out, "Anna?!"

"Yeah?" She spun around. I jumped off my bed and picked up the paper. I walked over to her and placed it in her hand.

"I wrote some things," I replied. She gave me a sincere smile and thanked me, before closing the door behind her. I turned to the boys, engulfing them all into a hug. I missed them, even though I was just one day without them.

"Are you alright?" Louis asked, as I went to sit down on my bed. Niall and Harry sat next to me, while Liam and Harry sat on the chairs in front of me.

"I don't know to be honest. I don't want to stay here, though," I admitted.

Harry patted my back before adding, "You're going to have to be out soon though."

I looked at him, confused. "What do you mean?"

Liam sighed, "We're going to have to start the tour next week."  

"We all thought it was unfair on you but Simon said it was so nobody got suspicious. Yeah, but I'll call him up right now." Niall got out his phone and clicked a few times, while holding the phone in front of me and waiting patiently.

"Hello," Simon greeted.

"Hi, it's Zayn," I said, once I realised that nobody else was speaking.

"Zayn! How are you?" Simon showed little signs of enthusiasm.

"I'm good but I just wanted to say that I'm OK with the tour starting next week and all." I tried to cut the chit chat.

"OK! That's great! So, I'll see you a couple of days before the tour starts for a short meeting!" Simon cut the call.

"I guess that's sorted then," Louis muttered.

(A/N: Thank you so much for the 256 reads, 23 votes and 14 comments! Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Yay! One Direction won TWO Brit Awards! Haha, Harry ran from the toilets! Only him! So, do you think Zayn will slowly get out of depression? Do you think Simon has a point? Stay awesome!)