Simon
Ever since I learnt about why papa had to remarry, I didn't feel mad at him anymore. My siblings looked up to me and by being the eldest, I had to now do what was right. But it wasn't for Nanny McPhee, it was for Lou.
Before she left, she said she loved me but best friends don't love each other that way. I didn't know if I could return the feelings, because up until know I thought what I'd been doing was normal. I also realise how much I really missed her, life was slightly boring now that she'd left.
And my life had never once been boring.
Papa walked into the room while Nanny McPhee was tucking Chrissie in. They all huddled around Lucy and I's beds as I sat up cross-legged. Papa sat opposite me as I recall the moments from today. We had to beg Mrs Quickly our new 'mummy' to marry papa otherwise we'd loose everything.
I think I hated her more than Aunt Adelaide and Lucy's father. No, not more than Lucy's father.
"I'm sorry." He whispered as he let Chrissie sit on his lap. "I should have told you, I see that now. If I'd discussed matters with you before maybe we wouldn't be in this mess at all."
"No, it was our fault." I spoke up, I was starting to wake up to reality. "We should have known you had a good reason of getting married."
"Well whatever happens, at least this way we'd all be together. That's what matters most, isn't it and I promise I'll never hide anything that affects us again. I can see your all more than capable of understanding." My eyes lower slightly, as I think about Lou.
She was the most understanding of us and how much I thought I took her for granted.
But at the same time she was so humble; I don't know how she did it. I'd never seen Lou cry as much as she did after I talked to Papa, I'd never seen her look so vulnerable.
"Papa?" Sebastian speaks up, his lisp not as noticeable as it normally is. "Yes, my boy?"
"Do you think mama still thinks about us where she is?"
"I'm sure she does. I know she does." A smile starts to make its way on my face. "Now Chrissie, why don't you choose us a story?" Chrissie eagerly stands up and walks over to the bookshelf. Papa then turns to me.
"I got this yesterday," His eyes lower to the thing in his hand, handing me a letter. I opened it as Chrissie handed Papa a book.
I instantly recognise it as Lou's handwriting. I started to read it, but it wasn't addressed to me. No, it was a story.
A smile tugs at my lips of the small memory of her, at least she has something to be remembered by.
The way she writes is very much like the way she speaks; the truth, and her love stories were always the greatest, even for me. I would never admit that though.
I read it a few times, my smile growing bigger. She had written about the day I had played pranks on her to the point where she was crying. She had written about the day we met.
I wasn't sure how she remembered these things, because even now it wasn't a very vivid memory in my mind.
She had only written about a small part, because up those stairs were a series of pranks. Pranks that would make her very, very upset. I got to admit though, we got her good.
But it didn't matter. Lou was safe, alive and well.
Before papa goes to leave the room, he looks at me. "Don't worry Simon, I sent an invitation to her father for the wedding.'' He tells me and I pray her father accepts the invitation.
I try not to get too ahead of myself, but I could be seeing Lou again. Now all I can think about is her, and my mind is painted with pictures and memories of her.
Like the day we first properly talked to each other. It was a month after Lou had arrived, and she was sitting with her legs over the window sill. She did it a lot.
And the day mama died and I got angry at her for not understanding, but instead I found out that the exact same thing happened to her mother. And the day she left.
Without realising, I slip into her bed, the quilt rubbing against my skin. I eventually fall asleep to her scent, which leaves me to think; Do I love her?
