blur | grayson dolan

Chapter 17: Innocent

Chapter 17: Innocent

Song: Stay
Artist: Rihanna

A/n Warning: There is self harm in this, I'm not encouraging it, this is just Kayleigh's doing.

Ever since the incident regarding Nathan, NightShade and I, I've been out more.

The 'good girl' Kayleigh burying deep down inside of me.

I went to parties, got drunk, vandalized some stuff, T'Pd the principals house.

Some bad shit.

Like right now, I'm blasting Heathens by Twenty One Pilots. A bottle of whiskey next to me and some cigarettes.

I take a sip of the acohol, it burns down my throat. Giving me a soothing sensation.

I hear bangs on the door.

"KAYLEIGH ANGEL ROSE! OPEN THE GOD DAMN DOOR!" I hear Scarlett yell.

"PLEASE!" Liza adds.

They don't care about me, they don't like me. No one does, not even my parents. That's why they handed me to Kaile.

"GO AWAY!" I yell.

I want to be left alone.

I want to sleep.

Forever.

"NOT UNTIL YOU OPEN THE DOOR!" Benny yells.

I bite my lip, headng over to my mirror.

I look at myself, I've gotten paler and there's bags under my eyes.

I take my razor out, the blades glinting from the light.

"KAYLEIGH, BABY PLEASE OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!" Leo yells.

"All the pain will be gone soon. Your lives will go back the way it was. Tell Haley I love him, and Kaile," I croak.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN? KAYLEIGH STOP!" Scarlett yells.

I wish I were back home, my two bestfriends must miss me like crazy.

But the pain will be gone.

The pain will be gone.

I slide the blade across my wrist, letting the blood drip on the floor.

It feels so good. The pain, not that I've been through something like this.

I continue cutting my wrist, the pain giving me a very pleasant feeling. I like this feeling.

I sob into my hands, the banging becoming louder and louder.

"KAYLEIGH ANGELICA ROSE! OPEN THE DOOR OR ELSE I'LL KICK IT DOWN!" A very familiar voice says.

"I can't. This way the pain will be gone," I say weakly. "I'm sorry for everything. For living, for being a bitch, for always being fucked up, for almost getting raped, for changing, for doing bad things, for still breathing."

"Angelica?"

No.

Luca.

It can't be.

"Luca?" I croak out.

"It's me Angelica, please open the door, for me Angel, for me," He says.

My Luca is here.

I go to the door, opening it.

Luca stands there with my friends.

Luca is my bestfriend since diapers, my older brother. Not that I needed another one, be was always there for me. And Amanda.

He wraps his arms around me, I cry into his shoulder.

As they say.

Pain makes people change.

______       _       _ _ _ _ _ _ _____ __  __ _ __ _    ____

Luca is NOT Hedeze's cousin.

A different Luca.

This made me cry.

And Kayleigh believes that she cuases all the bad things and should die with a certain someone encouraging her.

Ok so basically on saturday my dogs ran away. We have a fence and in our backyard we have concrete and towards the fence dirt. So my dogs decided it would be FUN to go and dig a hole to escape. They rid and my dad and I have to jump the fence and look for them, like when we junped it was trees, plains, bushes and grasslands. We had a mega pain in the ass looking for them. So we searched the whole behind the fence for like 1 hour and we couldn't find them. My dogs are boxers, one male brindle with white socks, chest and on his nose. His name is Kenai. Our female is fawn/red and has white on her hind legs and her chest and nose, her name is Chilli. So my older sister coaches under 10s boys for basketball, when she and my mom went and took her to her boys game they saw an asian boy running with a brindle boxer WITHOUT a leesh, the dog had a black double studded collar. My mom at that time didn't know the dogs were missing. Basically Kenai and Chilli are inseparable, Chilli almost got run over but she went to some random lady, on face book that lady is in the 'Derrimut/ Deer Park watch group' the same one as my mom. The lady posted a picture of Chilli saying that the poor baby almost got run over :(. My dad went and got Chilli back. My sister said she recognized the asian boy as someone who takes the same bus as her, she sees him walking everyday from the same street. We figured that he had King (Kenai's nickname) so my sister went door knocking :') on that street that he always walks through. I call it SNOB CENTRAL because NO ONE Answered their god damn fucking door. Man if I wanted a bitch I would've gone and got Chilli, gosh. Anyways we went to a nearbye park calling out Kenai's name. An old man went up to us and asked if we were looking for our dog. I started crying ;( because Kenai is my little Prince. He was so nice (unlike the snobs) and said if he sees Kenai that he'd hold on to him. So we went back home and told my day that no one answered. My dad said we should all go to SNOB CENTRAL and try again. STILL no one answered. We were about to go home until we saw that asian boy. We asked him if he'd seen Kenai (because he wasn't there with him) the asian boy said yes, but was a bit hesitant. (Mother fucker trying to keep my god dam King shifty asian piece of mother fucking crap! No offense) anyways he said he was at his house so we went there and got Kenai back, but he was without his collar. The asian boy said that he put it in the bin cause it was 'stinky'. And im like "This collar is made out of leather, all around, double studded. It was bought two weeks ago. Therefore it can't be stinky. Bitch all I gotta say is you lyin piece of shit. You pissy pussy thot." In my head of course. But I'm thankful none of them was severly injured. (Although my older sister made jokes about how the asian boy took Kenai to eat him :') ). With King and Queen together we were happy.

Yeah, so my dogs ran away.

Gave me a mother fucking heart attack.

-grace