All Mixed Up

Popping the question

The air between us couldn't even be broken with a hammer it was so thick (metaphorically).
"What?" I ask, determined to find out why my crush had asked to talk to me and take me outside and he was so panicked, as it seems.
"Well," he starts, taking a few hurried breaths. "Genevieve Walker, one of the girls I was friends with died!" He exclaims as he throws himself onto me, crying into my shoulder just as Ella had when she was upset those few nights ago.
"Did you have a crush on her?" He unburies his head from me and looks deeply into my eyes.
"Why does it matter? Of course not, though." He answers, continuing to weep into my uniform after.
"Just wondering." We stay there for a while: him weeping into me while all I can do is comfort him. Of course, it gets awkward when Emil and Lukas pass by and it's not as if they could keep quiet after seeing that.
"Mathias what are you doing?" Lukas asks in his serious, monotonous voice.
"I'm mourning, Lukas. Join me!" Mathias says, though his words are muffled since his mouth is covered by my light blue Mika blazer.
"I'll pass." Lukas answers, going into class. Emil stays, however, looking as if he wants to talk. Who do I want to talk to more, though... Emil or Mathias? My mind races but of course, it's not fast enough. Mathias manages to pull away from me and wipe the tears away, saying he's going to go and join Lukas in the class; no surprise there.
"Kaia I-" Emil cuts himself off after Mathias leaves, not really knowing what to say; if he should say anything at all, even!
"Emil I'm confused. You had no problem kissing me but you stated you didn't like me..." I wonder, looking at his eyes drop their gaze to the floor but they soon meet mine once again.
"To be honest, I don't know either. I know you like Mathias but..."
"Whenever you say that there's always a but at the end! Just tell me what's going on!" I yell but not loud enough for anyone else to hear, really.
"I wish I could, Kaia." He turns and leaves without another word spoken. Inside me, a will of giving up is beginning to sound good but I can't...

Not yet...

"I wish you could too." I turn and leave, not even hearing him calling out, even if he his. I enter the class and all eyes are on me.
"Boyfriend troubles?" Lukas flatly says, not even sounding like it's a joke.
"Shut up, Lukas." I coldly reply, sitting at my desk and hiding my face. I close my eyes, sighing away my problems but as if that would get rid of them. A hand delicately touches my back and thinking it's Ella, I hit it away.
"Go away!" I shout but it's my loud enough since I'm burying my head in my arms on the desk.
"Geez, Kaia, I'm only trying to help!" I look up in horror at Mathias' look of hurt.
"Oh, sorry Mathias I thought you were someone else." I explain. A thought suddenly enters my mind. "Mathias," I start. "What're you doing for the Mika Festival?" I ask, and he thinks. I notice his eyes locker to Lukas but quickly away.
"Well, nothing I guess." 'Opportunity' flashes in my mind and I stand faster than I've ever done before.
"Maybeyouwannagowithme?" I mumble, barely taking a breath or pause and clearly, and understandably, he doesn't understand. "I was asking if you, you know, wanted to hang out at the festival with me?" My heart thuds like a running elephant while he goes quiet, his mind racing with possible answers.
"Sure!" He answers, a usual Mathias grin pinned on his face.
"I'll see you there!" He waves and returns to Lukas' side.
"Yeah," I murmur nervously. "See you."