It’s not easy, dating someone famous. Some people are under the misconception that it’s a walk in the park, when it’s more like a walk in the park in the winter blizzards in Boston while being attacked by a pack of hungry squirrels. Yup, that sounds pretty accurate. Anyway, I’ve been with Dalton for about a year now, and let’s just say, it hasn’t been easy. It’s not the fighting that bothers me, even though we do fight, but it’s all the things that catalyze those fights. The fans just aren’t the supportive, loving group of people that they claim to be. But I can’t let other people control my relationships. I mean, if we really love each other, then that love should be able to transcend anything, right? A love worth crossing oceans for, that’s what they mean.
Dalton’s coming over soon, but I can’t say I’m happy about that. I don’t want to argue anymore, it’s exhausting on so many levels and it puts so much strain on us, on our relationship. It hurts. The worst injuries you will sustain in life are those from words. Words have the power to build us up or tear us down.
The doorbell rings and I slowly make my way towards the door and open it to reveal Dalton. He looks as if he’s fueling all his self-control into appearing calm. “Hey,” I say.
“Hi,” he says, not making eye contact.
“Um, come in.” And he does. We stand in the entryway in silence. But it’s not a comfortable silence like it used to be. There’s an elephant in the room, but it won’t show itself. “Carly, tell me the truth, are you cheating on me?”
I stand in silent shock for a moment before I manage to gather my thoughts, “No. Why would you—What? NO!”
His head snaps up and our eyes lock. He isn’t wearing eyeliner. “Don’t lie to me.”
That hurts. “I’m not!”
He raises his voice, “Then why is everyone saying that you’ve been seeing someone else behind my back?!”
I raise mine in response, “Everyone? Like who? Name one person!”
He fumbles, but then, “The fans!”
I scoff, the fans, lately they’ve been an issue a lot. “Really, Dalton? The fans? What kind of fans would spread vicious rumors about me?”
“It’s not a vicious rumor if it’s true,” he shoots back.
“Well, it’s not! You always do this! You choose your fans over me!”
He looks hurt and speaks normally, “No, I don’t.”
I lower my voice to a murmur, “But you do. You have been for a while.”
“Name one time,” I can see the anger burning behind his eyes.
“You take their side over mine every time! Whenever we fight like this, it’s always because the fans said something and because you don’t love me enough to trust me.”
“Carly, I—”
“Just let me finish. I know that the fans are important and they support you and you love them, but you have to make some boundaries for yourself. You can’t let them get in the way of your relationships. And I know that may sound hypocritical, because I let the things they say get to me, but that’s not the point. What I mean is that they may mean a lot to you, but if you’re always putting them above me, then I don’t think this can work.”
“I don’t put them above you!” I can’t tell if he’s angry or just hurt.
At this point, everything inside of me boils over, “Stop saying that!” Hot tears of frustration burn at the back of my eyes, “You’re not listening to me! You never listen to me anymore!” The last part kind of just slipped out, unexpected.
“Well this solved nothing,” he hisses. “I don’t need you anyway,” and just like that, he’s gone.
I stand there for a moment, and it’s as if someone has lifted a huge weight off my chest but then punched me in the stomach right after.
* * * * *
It’s been six months since the abrupt breakup, Dalton and I haven’t spoken. The hate from the fans hasn’t stopped or slowed, but I’ve learned to not let it get to me. Telling them off won’t solve anything, and a man who won’t stand up for his woman is not a man. And I’ve found that I don’t need him.
