Funeral

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We got out the car and approached his

other family members. His brother,

sister- in- law, and nephew wasn't

there. I agree with them. They

shouldn't have to see the person they

loved get put 6 feet under. I walked

with his family and saw his casket. I

immediately stopped walking.

'You should be in that casket! Not him!'

My mind went crazy. I broke down into

tears as I ran towards him. "Niall!

Please come back to me! I'm so sorry!

Niall please!" I screamed at him

knowing he was gone. Gone forever. I

was then pulled away by his father

telling me it's going to be ok. I fought

him telling him to put me down. This is

why I don't come to funerals

"Julianne." I heard Greg's voice. I

turned around and ran to him. "It's

gonna be alright." "Stop saying that.

You know it's not. I was supposed to

die. Not him." I cried. "Everyone were

starting." I heard someone call. "Let's

go." "I-I can't. I'm not ready to say

goodbye." I cried not ready to leave

someone I truly loved. "Take me home.

Please" I begged. "I can't. If it was you

in there, Niall would've been there at

your side since the moment you left

him. He loved you Julianne. And he

always will." Greg said. It's true. Niall

would've been there for me. The least I

could do is be there for him. "Julie,

your face." Denise spoke. "Come with

me, let's get you cleaned up. I nodded

and left with her. After wiping my face

of all the makeup, we went inside.

"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust-" I

blocked out everything the priest was

saying and concentrated his beautiful

face. He was in a beautiful tux and his

hair styled like always, in a quiff. Since

I was in the front, I reached out to

touch him. I touched his jaw line, his

hair and I kissed his lips. I pulled back

caressed his cheek. "I will always love

you Niall. Always." I then returned

back to my seat and that's when they

closed his casket and lifted him. I

wanted to scream and tell them to put

him down so I could be by his side

every minute. They proceeded to leave

and everyone followed. I got up slowly

and followed behind everyone. Then

after saying prayers and blessing his

casket, he was down 6 feet. I turned

away and died of heartbreak. I

suddenly felt dizzy and collapsed. "I-I

need m-my inhaler." I said gasping for

air. Denise went in my bag and found it

and handed it to me. I then felt a bit

better after using it. I then ran to the

parking lot trying to get away from this

pain and agony. I went in my bag again

to put away my inhaler and took out a

razor. I took my coat off and rolled my

sleeve up and I pressed the blade onto

my scarred skin. I felt nothing. No

blood, no pain. Nothing. Then the

blade flew out of my hands.

'But it couldn't have done that. Blades

don't fly' I thought. I went in the

direction where the blade flew and it

went into a tree. Then it carved it self

and it said,

"Remember my last words. I will

always love you. -Niall." I gasped at

what I saw and I felt like he was there

He was trying to save me. "I love you

too Niall." I spoke as I looked at the

tree where his last words were carved.

"Julianne!" I heard as I turned around.

"We were worried about you. Please

don't scare us like that." Maura said. "I-

I'm sorry. I won't do it again. "Ok let's

go." "Wait! I want to take a picture of

this first." I then took out my phone

and took a picture of his last words. It

was truly beauiful. I saved the picture

and used it was my screensaver. Now I

will always have Niall with me

wherever I go. And I will always

remember that this is the day Niall

saved me from suicide.

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