Incorrect Homestuck Quotes

Incorrect Homestuck Quotes #1

Dave: on a scale of 1 to 100 how much do you love your boyfriend
Karkat: DAVE YOU *ARE* MY BOYFRIEND. 
Dave: oh okay let me rephrase it
Dave: on a scale of 100 to 100 how much do you love your boyfriend

Vriska: Let's say you are in trou8le and in desper8 need of help. What do you do?
Kanaya: Make It Through Myself
Vriska: Okay, yes. 8ut you can't.
Kanaya: Why Cant I
Vriska: It's not important why you can't. You so desper8ly need help. You're in a very 8ad situ8tion.
Terezi: 4 V3RY B4D S1TU4T1ON? WHY? 1S SH3 OK4Y?
Vriska: *sigh* Yes, she's fine.
Kanaya: If Im Fine I Dont See Why I Cant Help Myself

Eridan: here is my wwall of inspirational men
Feferi: Is t)(at a picture of you?
Eridan: yes. i am big enough to admit that i am often inspired by myself

John: when have i ever done anything rash or irresponsible?
Jade: i keep a list. it's alphabetized 

Aradia: what could be better than serving up smiles? 0u0
Sollux: beiing dead or anythiing el2e

Jane: I've been trying to eat more vegetables.
Dirk: Jane, carrot cake is not a vegetable.

Kanaya: Hello Rose
Kanaya: Have You Made Any Sarcastic Comments Today
Rose: Sadly, no. But it's still 4:30.

Unnamed Pirate: We've captured the person you care about most!
Mindfang: Unless you've somehow captured me without my knowledge, that's impossi8le!

Doc Scratch: *showing the Handmaid a picture* Look at this little angel.
Handmaid: *realizes the picture is a younger version of herself*
Doc Scratch: She's going to grow up to be a warrior-ass motherfucker.

Meenah: im the shit
Meenah after the scratch: im STILL the shit
Meenah during the final fight: im the fucking shit with god tier powers

Cronus: Okay, so you and I are married.
Kankri: We are n9t married.
Cronus: Relax, it's just pretend.
Kankri: If we're married, then I want a div9rce.

Nepeta: :33 < terezi made out with dave
Karkat: WHAT!? WHERE?
Nepeta: :33 < im assuming on the mouth

Dirk: This is crazy, but I'm having feelings again. You remember feelings, right?
Jake: Yes. I have feelings every day of my life
Dirk: Do you?
Jake: Are you saying you dont have feelings?

Mom: rose get me the whiskey
Rose: Okay, but.... I want to tell you that I'm gay.
Mom: oh interesting
Mom: now get me the whiskey 

Rufioh: how dumb do they th1nk we are?
Mituna: 50M371M35 KURL0Z L34V35 M3 4 P1C7UR3 0F F00D 1N5734D 0F 4 5H0PP1NG L157

Latula: 1 thought h4pp1n3ss st4rt3d w1th 4n h. why do3s m1n3 st4rt w1th 4 u?
Porrim: I think yo+u have dyslexia.