Beatles Imagines

18. George

"Were you ever happy with him?" George questioned me, brushing an unruly lock of my hair out of my face. His eyes were full of bewilderment and curiosity, and I wondered if I reciprocated the exact same look.

"In some aspects, I suppose I did. But I didn't fall for him because I was completely intrigued, but rather, he provided security. He was loyal." I responded, the words spoken was a complete new concept that I'd never willingly admitted to anyone else. It was rather selfish, but it was the truth and I wouldn't tell him otherwise.

"Well look where security brought you." He responded with a slight smirk, his eyes darting around the open field around us. "To the wild side."

"I guess." I responded, swallowing down the guilty feeling that churned inside me. For whom I felt guilty for, I didn't know.

George released a small sympathetic hum, and lifted my chin with his finger when my gaze turned down to the grass below us. I looked into his eyes, which were so brilliant with their rich brown color that it was hard not to get lost in them all day.

For so long I'd wished that I could look into my husband's eyes and find the same feeling within me as I looked at him. For nights on end I would cry myself to sleep, feeling so selfish that I'd felt my heart flutter whenever his presence was made known. For so long, I'd deceived myself by saying that I was truly in love with Broderick.

But now I realized that there as no forcing my feelings. I no longer was willing to embellish what wasn't there. I couldn't simply persuade myself to admire nor love him, not when there was George to stand in the way of it. Broderick showed me the Earth, but George showed me the galaxy. How I wished it was the other way around.

"When are you going to tell him?" George questioned the dodgy topic with brute force. "How much longer do we have to hide?"

"It's more complicated than just going and leaving him, and you know that..." I sighed, feeling as though I'd explained the reasons a million times. I probably had. "My parents would disown me if they found out I'd committed adultery. You know that. You also know how angry he can get whenever I bring even bring up the word; he doesn't believe in it."

"Do you love me?" He grabbed my hand and kissed the back of it softly before caressing it with his thumb.

"Of course I love you." I responded, before clutching his hand and giving it a small squeeze. "Don't doubt for a second that I don't love you."

"Then tell me why we have to hide it? Oh, you must know how much I'd love to announce our love from the rooftops."

"It would be too risky to go public. He would find out."

"My love, you're making excuses." He shook his head before turning his head toward the sky, a prominent frown overtaking his handsome attributes. "Why can't you take a risk? Why can't you live your life? You stay in that loveless relationship in that colorless house, and you enclose yourself into fictional security, and covet to be free. You are holding yourself back because you don't trust me enough. Is that right? You think that our relationship is too passionate and galvanic that it'll easily burn out."

"And how is it you know what I think?" I sat upright, feeling upset by his words. They weren't necessarily far from the truth, but the fact that he revealed what I couldn't reveal to even myself made me agitated. It hurt.

"Because I've observed you." He spoke with a earnest voice, his eyes darkening at what he said next. "And I know that you were willing to leave until-"

"Please don't bring the child into this." Tears pricked my eyes at the sudden mention of the sore topic. The topic that I'd only discussed with George once, and the topic that I vowed never to speak of again aloud. The memories were too painful to revisit. The loss was too great to put into words. Having to even bring up the word was difficult without leaving me in shambles. "Please."

"I'm sorry. You know I didn't mean to bring it up." He pulled me into his arms, his face as solemn as my own. I could tell he still hadn't recovered from the day that led to a calamity. "But how I wish that we'd followed through with our plans to run away."

"I wish that we had every day." I revealed our mutual opinion. "And one day I promise we will. Once I get a divorce, and we can leave this place."

"When will that be?" He questioned by whispering in my ear, his voice low and slightly impatient. I sighed once again, but knew that he had a reason for saying what he did.

"As soon as I have enough courage to." I responded, feeling like absolute rubbish that I kept him waiting. It led me to wonder why he'd held on so long. I frowned. "It's funny, because the day it happened was the day I had planned on breaking it off."

"Oh, how irony loves to tamper with my emotion." He exclaimed, breaking out of our embrace and  threw his body down onto the grass dramatically.

"I promise I'll end it soon." I spoke honestly, and lied down next to his warm body. Tears threatened to spill from my eyes because of the pain I'd inflicted on him for drawing out the situation and because I'd reopened wounds that I tried so hard to heal. "I promise."

"How do I know that you will? You've said it for six months straight, yet I've not seen a change in anything." His eyes were locked on mine, and his eyebrows furrowed in apprehensiveness. "I'm tired of having to wait. I'm not sure how much longer I can stand this without being driven to insanity."

"You must know that I'm trying." I whimpered, feeling a tear roll down my face. I hated the feeling, but didn't bother to wipe it away. "I'm trying."

"But are you, my love?" He asked rhetorically, before spilling his thoughts out into the rampant wind. "It kills me to know that it's him that you go to sleep with every night and wake up to every day. Whenever I think about it, it makes me utterly ill. If you crave his simplicity, and you think that our love is too eccentric, then tell me now. Don't lead me to a dead end."

I felt his arms engulf me in a warm, embrace unlike his inhospitable and sorrowing words. It amazed me at how benevolent he was. He was comforting me even though I was the villain in this situation. I had been unable to leave my husband and carry his child. The fact he was willing to even touch me right now was enough for my eyes to become faucets.

"I will tell him tonight." I decided, the words spilling out of my mouth before my mind could even process the words. Though it was an abrupt thought, I would be true to my word, unlike past times which I'd brushed off my declaration. I felt like it was the truth, unlike any other time. "I'll tell him as soon as I get home."

I moved swiftly on top of him and kissed him, to which he delightfully replied. He hummed in relief, and grasped me tighter. I felt more tears on my face and wondered if they were his or my own.

"Really?" He asked, pulling away from the kiss. His eyes glittered with enjoyment.

I nodded my head. There was no way I'd leave him. Though our love was passionate and abrupt, and although I had not been with him nearly as long as I had been with Broderick, I loved him more than any other. George meant more to me than anyone else and the flutter in my heart gave me reassurance that he was the one.

Once, that flutter had made me feel damned, but now, I felt freed.

~
A.N: Not my (b)roderick.
Lol, I'm sorry for not updating.