Alcatraz

Letter 10- N I A L L

25 May 2014

 

 

Dear Zayn,

 

I regretfully must inform you that I had to leave before the post arrived on Thursday, but I look forward to reading whatever words you’ve graced the page with when I return in two weeks. (I refuse to believe that there won’t be such a letter in my post box, so you better not disappoint me, mister!)

 

I hope you’re in the mood for some good reading materials over the span of the time I’m away from home; I plan to update you on my whereabouts and adventures on every leg of the trip, so be prepared, Zayn! Being away from home, I won’t get your replies for awhile, but do feel free to flood my postman with letters so I have something to occupy me when the inevitable post-vacation depression hits. (That’s a thing, I swear!)

 

Now, on to the happenings so far! Well, we left early Thursday morning (and by early, I mean ten o’clock. I see that smirk on your face, but I am most definitely not a morning person so don’t laugh!) But guess what?! You should be proud of me. Do you know why? Because I managed to pack all my shit (including a satisfying variety of snapbacks and hightops, I’ll have you know) into ONE suitcase! Sure it wasn’t the “Liam-approved” bag, but still. It was a miracle. I’m rambling, though, so back to the trip. Harry insisted that we take “the scenic route,” so the drive took much longer than expected. I will admit it was beautiful and actually a lot of fun getting there, though, so props to Curly for that idea. We took I-90 pretty much the whole day, so I got to see Mount Rushmore for the first time! Remind me to send you a picture once I get home and have access to the finer amenities like a printer again. Damn it, I keep getting off track! Even on a page, my ADHD tendencies shine bright (like a diamond). See, that was a perfect example right there. I just can’t help myself, sorry. Feel free to tell me I’m an idiot. No harsh feelings, I promise.

 

Okay, so I’ll just describe things day by day, if that’s all right. On Thursday, we ended up staying the night somewhere in the Black Hills area of South Dakota since we had already been sitting in the car for nearly twelve hours. Honestly, I think Liam was about to smack me by the end of the day. To be fair, when you put Louis and me together in a tight space for a long period of time, we tend to get a little too hyper and obnoxious, so I can’t say I blame him. Anyway, we finally got to Rushmore at about 10:30, just before the place was about to close for the day. Now, I’m not usually one for museums and history and learning and that kind of shit, but I was actually very pleasantly surprised by those four old dudes carved into the mountain. I mean, damn, the talent and hard work put into that place is incredible! I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned this to you before, but I have what is probably the world’s shortest attention span. They say a goldfish have an attention span lasting all of three seconds, but let me tell you, I can rival the dullest of them. (That made me sound like a fucking dumbass, but fuck it. I can’t be bothered to erase my incoherent babbling. That, and I have a small bit of hope that my idiocy will bring a smile to your face. I’d love to see that in person one day.) Um, so back to why I brought that up in the first place. Well, Louis and I are really quite alike, and after a few minutes of looking at the rock, we were bored already. Liam told us that there were going to be fireworks just before closing time, but that seemed far too long a wait. So we decided to make our own fun. Which, looking back on it, was definitely not a good idea, but whatever. This is what happened… It was about eleven o’clock, so naturally it was super dark (the park rangers had even turned all the hiking trail lights off), but that wasn’t enough to stop mine and Louis’ shenanigans! We decided that our best chance at escaping Liam’s watchful eye would be when the fireworks first started, so we acted like perfect little angels (yeah, right) until then. A few minutes later, a loud burst of red and gold sparkles lit up the sky and that was our cue. Louis took my hand and we sprinted off into the woods, completely unnoticed by Liam, who was mesmerised in childlike wonder by the fireworks. Now, Louis and I generally don’t have the best ideas, and this one was probably one of the worst, honestly. I won’t get into too many details because this letter is already novel-length, but basically, we got lost in the woods with our iphones conveniently locked in the car and Liam had to get some of the rangers to come find a couple of twenty-something year old kids at midnight. And that’s the story of how we got banned from Mount Rushmore. True story.

 

So that was an eventful day, but luckily for us, the next day we were allowed to relax. We finished our drive to Oregon, Louis and I being on our best behaviour in order to appease Liam, who at that point, wasn’t speaking to us. When we checked into our hotel, Liam announced that we were going to have a day in, probably because he was afraid of us causing more trouble and possibly getting kicked out of a whole state. That would be a personal new record. Our Friday was spent sunbathing and swimming in the hotel’s huge pool. Since Liam’s a bit of a pushover, he took Harry, Louis, and me to a really fancy restaurant for dinner and paid for us all, apologising for giving Louis and me the silent treatment all day. And Harry, well Harry got a free meal out of the whole thing.

 

And that brings me to today. Liam woke up bright and fucking early (not even exaggerating this time, it was like six in the morning) and knocked on the door of the suite Louis and I were sharing. I’m pretty sure Louis answered it and told Liam to piss off because I sure as hell wasn’t getting out of bed at that ungodly hour. When I finally did get up a few hours later (in time for free breakfast, HELL YEAH), Liam and Harry were already down in the lobby waiting for Louis and me so we could start the day. We scarfed down breakfast quickly and then got into the car, off to some mystery destination that Liam wouldn’t tell us about. Apparently, after he woke us, he went for a morning jog like he usually does. I guess this place called Crater National Park is like a mile from where we’re staying, so Liam ran there. He said it was absolutely breathtaking, but I think I’ve had enough hiking-related fun for a while. But Liam really does know Louis and me quite well. The “mystery place” turned out to be the zoo! His reasoning for bringing us there was that we could act like children and no one would think anything of it. That’s our “Daddy Payne” for you. (Writing that nickname on the page actually makes it sound quite kinky…) But yeah, that’s how our day was spent. I got a zebra stuffed animal (my favourite animal, in case you were wondering), so I believe I had a thoroughly enjoyable day.

 

I hope you’re good, Zayn. I’ve been thinking about you and how I’m out here having all this fun while you’re stuck in some dingy old cell all day, and that’s totally unfair. I hope all this talk about my travels doesn’t seem like I’m bragging or anything…

 

Anyway, it’s late now and Louis is bitching at me to turn off the light, so I’ll end the letter here. I’ll post in the morning!

 

Good night and sweet dreams (or good morning, depending on when you get this)!

 

 

Your friend,

 

Niall.

 

P.S. My zebra needs a name, any suggestions? xx

 

 

 VOTE<COMMENT<FAN<Love you<3

(The zebra really does need a name, though. Let me know what you think Zayn should suggest naming it! Hope you enjoyed this long rambly letter.)