okay so idk if I've told you before, but I am panro ace, meaning I romantically can be attracted to any gender and sexually to none.
So I know this girl and I've had a crush on her for the longest time. It's been almost 6 months or sth.
Sooo a few weeks ago I was afraid she might be with that one guy. So I decided to text him via Instagram, with an acc where nothing is on it that could lead to me. In order to get my answer, I had to tell him I was from his town and knew who he was and that 'a friend of mine' liked the girl.
He told me they weren't a couple.
Well, actually I only asked if he had a gf. And explained that a friend of mine liked a friend of his.
So he told me no, he didn't have a gf.
BUT that still didn't say whether my crush was gay or not. So my best friend's best friend said I should ask the boy yet again but this time if that girl in particular was gay. So I did and let me tell you, my heart skipped a few beats when I hit the send button.
I send the message around afternoon or sth and he replied at around 12 a.m.
I read the message at approximately 12:45 a.m., meaning I was really tired. I didn't completely read his message and I couldn't really concentrate on it. And I replied. Let me tell you, this almost ruined my chances of getting to know whether she was gay or not. Because I answered kinda rude. Not RUDE! af, but not the nice way I usually do.
Because he said he wouldn't give away that private information and I should tell him my and my friend's names. I didn't know if I should do that. I mean, he could tell anyone. I asked a friend of mine who knew about my crush and who knew the boy I had asked about my crush's sexuality what he'd do. He said he knew the guy was really trustworthy and he'd tell him.
So I decided I would, but first I wanted to try sth. out. I told him he wouldn't know me -or at least not by name- anyway. He asked why he wouldn't. I f I wasn't at his school or just in a different grade. I told him I was in another grade and he asked how I knew my crush. From school or from some other activities. I told him I (well, of course, I told him all this about my 'friend' ;) ) knew her from school but we did talk and we said more than hello.
So he decided to believe me and he told me all he knew.
He told me, she was questioning her sexuality. He told me she did think she might be gay. And that he thinks she is. That she REALLY thinks she is gay but is afraid to tell anyone, because she's afraid she might be wrong and NOT gay.
YES. I know I told him I wouldn't tell anybody. But no one reads this anyways and anyone who does read it doesn't know her. I also didn't mention any names. Although I really like her name. I used to make fun of it in 6th grade, because the others did, too, and I desperately wanted to belong. Maybe I just should have tried becoming friends with her.
