Falling For Her

Lonely

"Baby girl he didn't play you, he played himself."

"Aye Avian you ready?" My best friend Jay asked me.
It was now Winter Break and we were on our way to his brother and his brothers girlfriend's house. I was supposed to spend Winter Break with Kenya but the thins didn't quite work out that way. I had to go and pull a fuck boy move on her. And now she doesn't even want to look at me let alone talk to me. I tried to explain myself but she just doesn't care. I guess you can say that I really fucked up this time. Kenya and I have been into so much shit this year alone. You would think that anything that gets thrown at us we would be able to bounce back. But I guess you can only take but so much before you have to bounce. I know Monica, Jays's Sister-In-Law was supposed to go and talk to Kenya. Try and get her to come with us at least for the first half of break. But Kenya just wouldn't budge.

"Avian you hear me or what nigga? Damn let's go!" Jay yelled at me.

"Oh my fault I'm coming let me just go grab my charger." I replied running back upstairs to my room. So many thoughts was running around my mind. I wish Kenya would stop being stubborn and actually talk to me. I shook my head of the thoughts that I was having and made my way down the stairs and out the front door. I tossed my bag into the trunk and climbed into the back seat. I slide my earphones over my ears and hit play on my phone.

I tried to call Kenya again and she just wasn't answering her phone. I was really starting to get pissed off. She just needs to listen to what I have to say. I have to get her back. I'm going to get her back no matter what. I'm tired of playing no answer with her little ass.

"Fuck!" I yelled out loud.

"You good?" Monica questioned me.

"Nah Kenya being stubborn ass hell and acting like she can't answer her phone. I'm really starting to get pissed off. I wish she was get out of her feelings and talk to me." I answered.

"You can't be serious my guy." Jay interrupted. "She obviously has a reason why she not answering her phone. You broke her fucking her heart and you not being man enough to apologize to her. You making it seem like it's her fault that you did what you did. You acting like you don't give a fuck about what you did and now she's just supposed to accept what you did. Nah my man you fucked up, and I hope and pray that she give you another chance. Knowing damn well that you don't deserve it. Avian I would kill to have a girl like Kenya. She's smart, beautiful, funny, loyal and that's just a few of the amazing things that she has to offer. She's what you call a ride or die. She stuck by your ass no matter what. And now you want to play victim. This shit ain't about you my nigga. It's all about her. You need to be busting your ass to try and get her back. On your knees begging. Look bro I love you and all. But you know that you dead wrong and I can't sit here and act like you didn't do shit wrong when this is all on you." Jay snapped.
No lie I never seen this nigga ever speak so passionate about something. And he's right I was the one that fucked up. I don't know how to make it better. I don't know if I should even try to make it better at this point. Ever since Kenya messed her foot up shit hasn't been rocking with us. One day i love her and I want to be with her and the next day I don't even want to look at her. I just need to sit down and talk to her. Face to face. I need to see where her head is at. I do know that I love her and that I have love for her. It's crazy how the night that I kissed this girl I really didn't care about Kenya. I told myself that I'm done with her and as far as I was concerned there was no longer a Kenya and Avian. So why do I now care. Why do I feel this way?