Her Eyes

Chapter 75: IF I NEVER LOVE AGAIN

A nurse approached them a little while after their meeting with Dr. Williamson. She explained the procedure for Norman's evaluation and possible treatment plans. Alex let out a sigh of relief when the nurse mentioned they'd be keeping the boy overnight. As much as he knew it would worry Norma, Alex felt safer knowing that Norman would be a good hour and a half away.

He watched from a distance as Norma kissed her son goodbye, desperately trying to offer him some comfort and support. But her son once again pushed her away. It was sad to watch her try so hard to reach out to her son and gain nothing in return.

"What now?" Norma murmured once she reached the former sheriff's side.

He gazed at her softly, reaching out to gently caress her back. "We go home."

The tension between them grew as they pulled off of the sanitarium grounds. Alex could feel her nervousness beating with her fingers against the arm of the car door. "I did what I thought was right," he told her.

She rolled her eyes, scoffing at his feigned chivalry. "You don't always know what's best, you know. You swoop in like some white knight and expect me to weep at your feet with gratitude. You could have at least discussed the option with me before roping me into a marriage with you."

Alex glanced at her, his heart sinking in embarrassment. She had a point. He often wondered if the things he did were in her best interest or his own. His need for her was so strong that the line between insanity and clarity had become blurred. "I'm sorry. I was just trying to help."

But he always seemed to say the wrong the around her. "What's with you and this overwhelming desire to help me? Do you have some sort of a hero complex?"

He was silent for while, not really sure if he should say anything at all but the words poured out on their own accord. "You remind me of her sometimes."

Her eyes glued themselves to him, daring him on. "Who?"

He cringed a little at the thought. The emptiness inside him was beginning to pour out. "My mother," he muttered uncomfortably. He would had left it there but he couldn't fight off the need to give her a proper explanation even as the tears began to well in his eyes. "I was the one who found her. I was walking some girl home from school. I came home an hour later than I was supposed to, and if I had come home when I was supposed to I could have stopped her—I could have saved her." The memory of that day and the beating of his heart drowned out every coherent thought until he finally breathed deep enough to calm himself. "I don't know what I'd do if I lost you too," he admitted stoically. "I'm sorry I didn't ask you before. I'll stop interfering with your life."

Her eyes dropped to the hands that lay in her lap. "Alex," she whispered softly. "You've already saved me."

They pulled up to the house around four o'clock in the afternoon, the sun casting a ghostly shadow upon the exterior. "I'm gonna go down to the station and settle a few things, and then I'll come pick you up and we'll go to dinner," Alex stated as he climbed out of the car and handed her the keys to the Mercedes.

"But we already went out for breakfast," she complained in her motherly tone. "I'll make us something instead."

The former sheriff sighed, starting to make his way over to his SUV. "I thought you might want to get out of the house...take your mind off things." He knew how she felt about eating out so much. "Why don't you come over to my house and I'll make you dinner. Say six thirty."

She grimaced a little at the thought, offering him a gentle smile to disguise her disgust. "Sure. Yeah. Fine."

Alex scoffed in defense. "Norma, I'm not that bad of a cook."

"No, I wasn't—It's fine. I'll see you then," she assured him, turning towards her house and starting up the steps awkwardly.

"Okay?" he called after her.

"Okay," she shouted at him, stumbling up the steps before turning around to shoo him away. "I'll see you tonight."

He drove to his house instead of the station. He felt bad for lying to her but he needed time to find it. Sure enough it was still in the exact same place he'd left it before his stay at the motel. He had lodged it somewhere deep in his mother's piano for safekeeping; he was surprised it had somehow survived the fire and moving between the storage unit and his new house. Alex smiled to himself, shoving the old little black box into his pocket.

He was halfway through making dinner when Norma finally arrived. She smiled at him as he opened the door, stepping inside and handing him her coat. "Sorry I'm late. I had to stop for gas."

"No big deal. It's not like we're doing anything important here," he shrugged casually. "Dinner's almost ready. Hope you like spaghetti."

She laughed softly, following him into the kitchen. "Is that the only thing you know how to make?"

He rolled his eyes at her, returning to the stove to drain the pasta. "Funny." A sense of nervousness began to creep in knowing she was watching him despite the fact he'd made this meal a thousand times. "Just because I don't cook doesn't mean I can't. I know how to cook a lot more than just pasta."

"Of course...there's also grilling," she joked, taking a seat at the table.

He glared at her lovingly, setting down a full plate down in front of her. "The number for poison control is on the fridge if you feel like you need it." They smiled at each other. Alex was becoming accustomed to the domesticity of their relationship. He didn't know what was better: living a safe and lonely life or living with the woman he loved and fearing for his life. That latter was definitely more exciting. "I'm sorry today was so hard. You're doing the right thing for him."

Norma sighed, worry seeping back into the depths of her eyes. "I hope so."

Alex watched as she hesitantly took a bite, chewing slowly and thoughtfully. She seemed surprised that the small bite she'd taken hadn't killed her. "It's good," she told him honestly.

He laughed at her. "I can cook."

Her mouth fell open, searching for the right words. "I just like to take care of you," she stated in defense.

His heart warmed as he stared into her eyes. "I like to take care of you too. It's not a crime."