I'm Lucifer's Wife

26

Their Past

The moment I found my car, I didn't immediately leave. Nagantay lang ako sa loob at tsaka ko iniyak lahat ng nararamdaman ko. I cried my heart's out. I cried until they all ran dry.

Nakakainis. Nakakabanas.

The two dominant emotions that I'm feeling right now. Yes, it still hurts because who am I kidding? I may be over him, but there will always be a scar left. At ngayon nga, parang nabuksan muli ang isang sugat na matagal ng naghilom. It was hard learning the truth. Mas doble yung sakit na mismo sa kanya nanggaling ang katotohanan na matagal ko nang alam. That our love wasn't enough for him to fight. That I wasn't enough reason for him to stay. I understand his reasons, yes, but there's still a part of me that says that there could be another way than just leaving.

Yet, what really hurts the most are the 'what ifs' that had been plaguing my mind since then. What if he told me? What if he didn't leave? What would have happen to us now? Ang daming tumatakbo sa isip ko. All the things I've kept since I told myself to move on. Lahat nagbalik sa isip ko. Lahat lahat naalala ko.

"You really are gorgeous, Al." I smile at  Irish and Charm from the mirror.

"It wouldn't surprise me kung itanan ka na ni Ark pag nakita ka mamaya." We just laugh at what Charm said, but I could feel my cheeks burning hot. Taklesa talaga ang gaga. Kung ano-anong sinasabi.

I look at myself again and smile upon seeing the necklace he gave me just yesterday along with his letter. It was a simple silver necklace with a small star enclosing a heart as a pendant. It was actually his advanced anniversary gift to me. A proof na tumagal kami in secret for almost 3 years. Nakakatawa di ba? Lalo na at wala man lang nakahalata o nakapansin nito. Paano ba naman? Hindi kasi kami nagpapansinan dalawa. Yes, we have common friends pero sobrang dalang mo kami makita na magkasama na kami lang talaga. Syempre, alam ng barkada ko ang tungkol sa amin. Guess what? Supportive pa ang mga bruha. Not that I don't want them to be, nakakatuwa nga e. Natiiis namin na patago lagi kung magkita and those moments are really worth it. It's hard and difficult lalo pa at alam ng lahat na pagmamay-ari siya ng iba because of that damn arrange marriage between him and a friend of mine. But what others didn't know, palabas lang nila na nagmamahalan talaga sila. While Ark have me as his girlfriend, Eula have Miguel as her boyfriend. Kaya nga panatag ang loob ko kahit na silang dalawa ang magkasama. After all, head over heels ang gaga sa boyfriend niya.

Well, he's worth it.

I decided to wear a white balloon cocktail dress. Why? It because today is our company's annual party and I'm expected to be there. Lahat ng business partners pati media ay invited kaya kahit na ayaw ko wala akong magagawa kundi umattend. Isa pa, I am planning to make our relationship public for everyone to know that I'm already out of the market. Pagod na ako sa mga blind dates na pinipilit nina  Mama na puntahan ko. At mas lalong pagod na ako kakareject sa lahat ng nirereto at nanliligaw sa akin. Nauubusan na nga ako ng ipapalusot.

Isa pa, ang tagal na rin namin gustong ipaalam sa lahat ang totoo. After all, he's a free man already. Kasal na si Eula at maayos na ang gusot sa pagitan ng Wu at Espinosa. If it is just us, sinabi na aas namin just right after pumutok ang balita about Eula's pregnancy with another man which is actually Miguel, her real boyfriend. But we decided to let the introvercy cool down and now, I decided that maybe it's already time. It's my surprise for him.