The Broken

Five: Haunted

"The world we knew
Won't come back
The time we've lost
Can't get back
The life we had
Won't be ours again"
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"What the hell man? A boy? Why am i only knowing this now?" Matt exploded with questions, to try and understand the secret that his best friend held for so long.

Jason and Matt were best friends, but ever since Jason's life hit a wild turn he shut Matt out and kept a lot of secrets from him. Because he knew that if his friend was aware of all the troubles he got himself into, he'd want to protect him, to save him. But he didn't want to be saved. Before the death of his mother they used to be inseparable, but then with Jason's new life style, he managed to push his only true friend away. And now it was Matt's right to understand the full story.

Jason sighed before starting to explain the events that followed that night. In fact, he was never blamed for the accident by the authority; that boy was driving under influence, and he was the one who caused the crash, due to his recklessness. The boy's car bumped straight into his from the right side, resulting in his mother, who was in the passenger seat, being affected the most by the crash. She died instantly before the ambulance arrived. On the contrary of the boy who was brutally injured but died few days later at the hospital. As for Jason, he had few cuts and breaks that he soon recovered from. However, his recovery was only physical, while his mind was scarred for life.

"Jason.." he replied, seeing the despair that his friend was locking himself in, "it's not your fault man.."

"I can't help but think that they both died because of me. We shouldn't have been on that road at that time, and we were, because of me. Because i got in a fight with my mom that night and i just wanted to drive off to let out the steam, but she was so worried about me that she didn't let me go alone, despite our fight. Because she knows i tend to drive like a maniac when angry." Jason rubbed his temples hard, remembering the last sentence his mom said to him.

"I couldn't even say goodbye Matt." He shook his head, letting it all out, "she passed away without giving me the chance to apologize for upsetting her earlier. And it kills me, it kills me everyday. Because the last thing she said to me was that no matter what, she'll always protect me." His voice started shaking near the end, unable to hold back his tears, "and i was the one who's supposed to protect her Matt, and i didn't. I couldn't!"

Matt was paralyzed in his seat, seeing his friend break down in front of his eyes. He knew that there weren't any words that could be said at the moment. Words stood powerless in front of this unmeasurable pain.

"And, that boy.. he couldn't say goodbye too.. he could've been alive now, alive and well. He was too young." Jason resumed, the guilt filling his conscience.

Matt approached him, rubbing his back comfortably, "It was meant to happen, whether you were in that car or not. You need to forgive yourself.. it's time. You've lost almost everything because of that night. Stop beating yourself up for it." He finally spoke, understanding now why his friend was punishing himself everyday for what happened to the point of wasting all his money, and losing his girlfriend lastly.

He got sucked into drinking spending every night wasted in a bar, thinking that it'll make him forget. He was after anything that could heal his wounds. To top it all, Michael Locke, who couldn't give a crap about him, didn't make it easier for him. He lured him into more gambling every night until he lost all his money. And everyone ignored the real reason to why he showed a sudden interest in hurting Jason.

Regardless, he needed to heal from that night, it was where everything started. And it had caused enough harm.

"You have to promise me Jay. Promise me that you'll start moving on, from this, from Pamela, everything." Matt insisted.

Jason fixed him with his blurry teary eyes, as another flashback threatened to break him yet again, reminding him of his miserable case with promises.
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"I'm sorry baby, i'm so sorry.." he cried out, looking at her bandaged arms, and the cuts on her beautiful face. "I can't believe it, i just can't."

She had spent an hour in the surgery room while he waited outside, the anger and guilt eating him alive. He just needed to make sure she's okay. He couldn't believe what was happening, once again a car accident was bound to take away his life from him.

"It's okay, i'm okay.." she groaned in pain, failing to reassure him.

They both knew it wasn't okay. Her car accident was planned. Although it wasn't hard enough to kill her, it was worse. Michael had threatened the both of them earlier; they had become his favorite toy. He was using Jason's weaknesses against him until he gets him the money he owed him, which was impossible in such a short notice. And it was all his fault.

Seeing her beaten down on this hospital bed meant that he wasn't playing him with the threats. It meant that he will stop at nothing before taking away from him everything he had. And she was the most precious thing he had. She was everything good in his life.

He scanned her tired injured body, feeling his heart twitch in his chest. She tried her best to hold his hand tightly without wincing, but she failed miserably. He approached his hand to hers and caressed it. The weakness resonating from her, along with the sound of her heart monitor was almost deafening him. "I'll fix it. I promise you baby, i will.. i promise."

But it was too late to fix anything.
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Blowing the memory away into thin air, Jason rubbed his fingers nervously, feeling the same twitching in his heart, "I guess, I'm not that good at keeping promises."