The Broken

Eight: One Last Time

"Don't go, I can't do this on my own.
Save me from the ones that haunt me in the night.
I can't live with myself, so stay with me tonight.
Don't go."
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Pamela's POV:

I looked at the alarm clock next to the bed flashing 3:00am. Michael should be sleeping by now. Reviewing the plan in my head, I opened the door slowly and slid out. Walking nervously towards his room, I slid my face slightly from the half open door, to find him sleeping.

I wish he never wakes up again.

Then turning to face the stairs. I stood as close to the walls as possible, avoiding the creaky steps as I reached the bottom quietly. I looked at the locked door in front of me... It's now or never Pamela.

I turned the doorknob very slowly, making the least possible noise. I looked back up in the direction of his room; still no noise coming from there. It's my last chance. So I got out and closed the door carefully behind me, heading to the address I know by heart.

I only had one hour to return safely without getting on Michael's bad side. And the last time I did, it didn't end pretty well... So I'd rather not go through that again.

With every step I was taking, my heart was racing and my palms were sweating. The last time I walked this road I remember waking up in the middle of the night from a nightmare. I could swear that I've never felt that kind of pain in my chest before. And I knew, in my heart, that Jason was in danger. I didn't think about anything in that moment. Not about Michael, not about the deal, not even about myself. I just needed to see the only person that's keeping me alive, even though by distance.

I can still remember his bloodshot eyes and the blood running down his wrist. I felt that my whole existence was being shattered at that moment. Despite saving him that night, his image kept haunting me every minute of every day. I died every day just so he could live, and I wasn't planning on letting him give up on his life this easily.

Diving back into reality, I ran fast as the house got bigger with every step I took. Finally arrived, I opened the door with my keys since I figured last time that the door lock haven't been changed yet, and I entered the house that holds my dearest memories.

I went up on my tiptoes straight to the previously called Jason and I's room, hoping to find him asleep so I could steal small glimpses of my heaven. As I entered the room I saw his sleeping figure on the bed. And just like hypnosis, I was bewitched by his presence.

I contemplated his tousled hair as few strands fell onto his beautifully structured face. His breathing deep and relaxed, all the muscles in his face and body were totally at peace, unlike the last time I saw him.. Not a twitch, nor a quiver, barely any movement of his chest rising and falling with each intake of air. It's like time stood still, blocking the dangers of the outside as I was staring at the one person who holds the pieces of my heart together; my gravity.

"Pam?" I heard a voice from behind me taking me out of my trance. I turned around to see Matt staring at me skeptically.

"Matt I don't have time, please, I just wanted to see him one last time before I leave." I whispered, glancing back again at Jason.

"Where the hell were you? I came searching for you yesterday! What have you done to him and yourself Pamela? You don't know all the shit he's been through since you've been gone. And now you're here to see him before YOU LEAVE?!"

He had every right to be mad; he didn't know the full story, no one did, and no one will.

"I don't expect you to understand. But trust me it's better this way." I said, as I glanced back at my everything, a tear rolling down my cheek. "Take care of him Matt, please."

"Anything that happened could be undone Pamela. Don't do this again." Matt pleaded.

"Nothing could be undone." I said as I turned around one last time.

"NO! YOU ARE NOT LEAVING HIM AGAIN!" Matt screamed as I was headed outside the room.

I started walking towards the hall when I heard a cracked voice call out my name. The same voice that was my lullaby for a year now. The voice that belonged to the man I sacrificed my all for.

I felt the blood draining from my veins to the floor, the cold invading my body. I stood there numb, scared of turning around. Terrified of the effect of his hazel eyes on my existence.

"PAMELA?" He called out unstably, desperately. "I beg you. I am begging you, don't leave again."

I wish i didn't have to. I wish i could stay.

"I'm nothing without you Pam. Give me one last chance, please."

Tears began streaming down my face as I felt him come closer; but I still refused to turn around. His heavy breath was brushing slightly across my neck.

"I... I can't... I'm s-sorr-y I can't..." I stuttered and ran downstairs escaping his near touch, ignoring his distressed calls.

"Let her go" I heard Matt say as I closed the door behind me, his sobs echoing to no end in my ears.

I took a moment to catch my breath, but I was crying hysterically.

"I'm sorry... I'm really sorry... I love you with all my heart" I whispered to the air while looking at the stars, hoping that my words would magically reach out to him.

He thinks I left him because he messed up... He's oblivious to what had really happened.

Ignoring the unbearable pain in my chest and the breath stuck in my lungs, I started jogging back home hoping that Michael hadn't woken up.

When I got there, I looked at my watch, it was 4:47am. I wiped my tears with the back of my sleeves and entered the house carefully like I had left it.

"Where were you?"

My heart nearly stopped seeing him sat on the couch in the living room. I could feel my pulse beating in my ears and blocking every other sound.

"Don't make me repeat myself." He said firmly as he came closer to me over-towering my minuscule figure.

"I... I just, I just needed some air." After that sentence, all I felt was pain shooting through my body as he held me by my shoulders and slammed me on the door.

"You also know I hate lying." He snapped at me still holding me tight in place as I struggled to break free.

"LET ME GO MICHAEL! THAT'S ENOUGH!" I tried to gather the strength left in me, but in vain.

"Let me be clear one last time Pamela. If. You. Ever. See him again. Or go near him or even ask about him, i'll make sure that next time you visit him, it'll be at his funeral." He barked. "IS THAT CLEAR?"

I barely nodded, all the color drained from my face.

He let go of my grip and I felt my legs crumpling beneath me, making me fall to the floor, my vision getting blurry. I felt myself secluded from the rest of the world as my thoughts began eating me inside out.

Could this be the last time I see him?