Business as Usual~c.h.w

12. Loaded.

The next morning, I woke up with a raging headache and Apollo sleeping peacefully beside me. Just running my eyes over her peaceful facial features, the memories from yesterday come rushing back.

Good fucking job, Kana. You broke.

The only reason Apollo said that was to make you feel better and you know it.

Checking my phone, there's of course missed calls, missed texts, bullshit.

Deciding to look at my mother's text, she calls yet again without me being able to see it. Swiping the screen, I answer it.

"KANA LIGHT. ANSWER YOUR FUCKING PHONE WHEN I CALL YOU!" My so called mother yells through the phone.

Sitting up and jerking it from my ear, I glare at the phone.

"Sorry mother." I try to say but it comes out so raspy.

Again, good job Kana.

"Don't fucking sorry me. Just bring your ass to our house at four. You'll be meeting your fiance. Mark Tuan. I'm sure that Chae brat knows him. Okay, bye sweetie." Then the line goes dead and I can feel my very fucking being breaking again.

That's the one fucking thing I had control over and now it's gone.

It's gone.

I refuse to marry so random dumbass. The moment I actually start to let someone in the snatch that from me.

Realizing, I've just been staring at my wall in a stunted gaze, Apollo's voice drags me back to reality.

"Kana? Kana, what's wrong?" She says starting to sound more alarmed by the second.

Just getting up silently, I found myself family walking to my living room wherw commotion can be heard.

Ignoring the greetings from everyone, I spot the one person I was looking for.

Hyungwon.

I wonder how my parents will go about this huh? What are they gonna do banish me?

Hyungwon was just laying on one of the couchs with a tired expression, until I played directly on top of him.

He freezes just like the rest of the room. You could hear a feather drop.

"Um, Kana.. what are you...??" He asks low enough for me to hear then trails off.

I shake my head in refusal and try to ignore the racing in my chest.

"Kana, did I hear correctly? Did your mom say fiance?" Apollo suddenly asks.

"Fiance?!" The entire room besides Yoongi and Hyungwon chorus.

"We just got rid of one damn fiance and hears another one?!" Taehyung exclaims.

Right, Tae.

"Who is it?" Yoongi says curiously.

Taking a deep breath and trying to swallow my nerves, I answer their question very quietly.

"Mark Tuan."

"Mark?! As in works at Chae co, Mark?!" Wonho voices out.

"I don't know." I mumble into Hyungwon's chest.

He puts his arms around me and I silently thank him for not questioning me or anything.

Until, he stands up and pulls my hand along. He dragged me to the sunroom. The same room that all of the festivities with Apollo went down in.

As soon as he enters the room he hugs me. Something I've been needing for so long that I cant remember.

"It'll be okay, Kana. We'll get you out of this." He whispers in my ear while rubbing my back.

"No, it won't. What about you? I haven't actually been nice to you since I met you. I'm sorry." I say softly while trying not have a second break down like yesterday.

Damn it, Kana.

"Kana, you've gotta talk to me. Stop going silent on me. Talk to me. Please." He basically pleads.

I shake my head again.

"At four I've gotta go meet them. I've gotta be something I'm not. I can't do this anymore, Hyungwon! I'm so sick of this. I'm tired of this shit!" I try to yell but it comes out quieter than needed.

"You don't have to go." He says as he puts his arms back around me.

"But, I do." I retort.

"No you don't. Come here." Yoongi interjects while opening his arms in an all to familiar way.

Crashing into him, he hugs me and ruffles my hair.

"We can talk this out with everyone else. They can help. I'm not leaving you alone unless you're with Hyungwon. You're slipping again, Kana. Remember your promise? You're not going to disappear on me." Yoongi's voice rumbles.

"And you." He says pointing towards Hyungwon.

"She doesn't completely trust you, but I'm starting to. Please Just be here for her. She needs you." Yoongi speaks as if I'm not here.

I'm numb again. My head hurts and I can't focus. Yet, somehow Hyungwon's hand ended up laced with mine and we're all back in my living room.

I can't even register the conversation around me nor the looks.

I lost my small amount of freedom. The moment I got Apollo's back. I lost mine.

What cruel irony.

I don't know what to do.

I'm tired of wanting to scream all the time.

I'm tired of being tired.

I don't want to be this way anymore.

I don't want to be here anymore.

Why am I still here?