More than a month without uploading,
she comes back with a plot,
that no one ever wanted,
She's not a challenge to drag.
So prepare for an attack,
and by that, I mean cringe,
'cuz this mother fluffer's bout to get dragged through her fails.
First thing first, you're freakishly short,
it's weird, you look like a chubby noodle.
you have hair that was cool in 2005,
and wet you just look like a squirrel.
throw in a really annoying high voice,
and yup, that's Mae,
you're what would happen if failure whoo-hoo'd creativity.
you procrastinate uploading chapters
because being judged is scary,
you're so close to being forgotten
that the hate's imaginary.
the only reason you get reads is because you know how to develop characters,
who people ship with their friends because they think it's
*KAWAII*
oh?
Reasons why Mae's a fail! (yay!)
I'll give you some -
you never post, you overeat, all you do it rant and sleep,
your jokes are bad puns and memes with no originality,
and your family's sad you don't want to get a law degree at university.
anything that's embarrassing from your past you just delete.
You were vegetarian for like three days and what, you missed the meat?
Wow, I'm so impressed by your clear moral integrity.
You try so hard to be peaceful and diplomatic, but you can't open your mouth without your friends saying you're problematic.
I could go on, there's more if I check, there are more things on this list than times you've bleached your hair.
On your birthday you joked you'll die young.
Yeah, especially since walking up stairs makes you out of breath!
So your celebrity crush is fictional, and always a guy,
yeah there's no question as to YOUR sexuality.
It's not hard to put you in a box,
but you say you hate society,
I think it's just to hide that you're secretly an ATHLETe!
*cough* I'm... I'm joking. Obviously.
Repress it? Yup! Before I start crying! Let's wrap this sh*t up.
I'm gonna go hate myself, then cry into a bowl of soup,
shout out to all my fellow wattpadders, especially heeyitsm
a cringe compilation, mixed with fictional appropriation,
met with no deprecation,
it's the watt pad nation!
Click follow if you want to read four updates a year,
to see my last chapter (from ten years ago)
just swipe up, it's right up there.
leave a comment with your reaction,
you can call me a liar,
but you just witnessed the roast,
of Althea Mae H
three things -
1) IF YOU UNDERSTAND THIS REFERENCE I LOVE YOU FOREVER.
if not, it's a parody of danisnotonfire's youtube disstrack
2) I am working on an update, which should be up sometime this week
3) thank you so much for all the kind comments and support, I've been going through a tough couple months, and you guys make my day consistantly. I love you all.
*edit - I added the original this is based on at the top. *
YOU ARE READING
Trust Me - a Sophitz story
Fanfiction- Trust Me is not my first attempt at a full-length fanfiction with a plot, but it is my first successful one. - - This is set directly after Lodestar, and obviously, contains spoilers. Without spoiling my own story, I can say that it contains a lo...
