The Disconsolate Maiden

Chapter Fifteen

Homura smiled bitterly at herself as she stared at herself in the school's girls' bathroom mirror.

Leaning over, Homura splashed ice cold water on her face, making sure to show no signs that she had been crying. Just this once, she was grateful she had woken up too late to put on the small amount of makeup she tended to wear.

She didn't know what had happened, but when her final class for the day had ended, after having felt like crying all day long, she snapped.

"What's wrong with me..." Homura sighed, wiping her face on a towel. "Nothing is wrong. Everything is how it has alwa- no...how it's been for several years."

There was a sudden knock on the bathroom door.

"Homura are you in there?" a girl called out. It was Naomi.

Homura didn't reply at first, yet she really had no choice. Naomi already knew she was in the bathroom.

"Homuuuuuraaaa!" Naomi dragged out, pounding her fists on the door. "What's wrooooong!"

"I'm fine, really!" Homura called out, choking just a little. "I'm sorry!"

"Don't apologize for everything!" Naomi hissed irritatedly as Homura stopped in front of the door, reaching for its handle. "It's annoying! All you ever do is apologize! You could at least be a bit more grateful for things! I was seriously concerned about you this morning, but as soon as that stupid child came in our classroom, you just ignored me! Auugh!! I wish you would just get a grip on yourself!"

Homura pulled open the heavy bathroom door and met face to face with Naomi. The angry girl's face was entirely red, her eyebrows furrowed.

"Just...stop..." Naomi said more quietly, turning around, taking a few steps towards the school exit.

"I'm s-" Homura stopped herself, not wanting to anger Naomi anymore than she already had.

Naomi stopped walking, her hands still trembling in anger.

"Hey," Naomi said, her voice a bit more gentle. "Why won't you tell me?"

"T-Tell you what?" Homura stuttered nervously, though she already knew the question.

"Why won't you tell me..." Naomi said, turning around, her long hair swishing behind her. Behind her harsh, scolding eyes, Homura could see hints of sadness. The orange sunset shone in from the windows next to the two girls. "Why won't you tell me how you feel?"

"I'm sorry..." Homura apologized, already having forgotten how much Naomi hated to hear those words.

"Why..." Naomi sighed, taking a few steps back. "I don't understand..."

"I-I.." Homura wheezed. "I need to go home..."

"HOW IS IT THAT YOU'RE SO BLIND?!" Naomi screamed, bending over, her hands covering her face. Her shoulders jerked as she whimpered in the light of the dying sun.

"I'm sorry..." Homura whispered again, gently hugging Naomi, something she'd never thought she would do. Naomi had never once, up until this day, treated her as if her existence mattered at all. All Naomi did was pester her do go with her to a cafe after school, even though she always knew the answer would be a quiet "no" from Homura.

"I love you..." Naomi whimpered, throwing her arms around Homura's neck, sobbing into the girl's shoulder. "So, why is it that you can't see that?! Why are you so selfish?! Why will you never tell me anything?!"

Homura wanted to push Naomi away from her, not sure how to even respond to those words.

"I'm not worth it," the shy girl replied in an instant, not even thinking. "So you don't have to care. I'm not supposed to have friends. I'm not allowed to be close to anyone...not after what..." Homura backed away from Naomi.

"W-Why..." Naomi rasped. "You...I should have known..."

"I can't get close to anyone!" Homura almost yelled as she too, burst into tears.

Swinging open the school's door, Homura quickly left, leaving Naomi all alone at the school.

Once again, Homura had run from her problems instead of attempting to face them.

"I shouldn't even be alive..." Homura scolded herself, grimacing all the way home.