Chase & Adrienne

17

CHASE

FRIDAY AFTERNOON

"I really hope that was just a bad acid trip," Danny comments, finally breaking the spell of silence plaguing my car. The rest of us can do nothing but nod our heads in utter disbelief. It seems surreal, so unlike Adrienne, it's completely terrifying. 

"Are you okay, Chase?" Renee whispers from the backseat, leaning forward so that her head rests against the back of my seat. The rest of the group holds their breath in anticipation for my answer, like I'm a fragile sheet of glass, ready to shatter. 

"You guys," I mumble, my breath short, "I like Adrienne." The confession spills out of my mouth like a bloody nose, splattering everywhere, making a bloody mess of the once platonic reality we all once knew and loved. I swallow hard. "I guess it took me seeing that to realize it, but it doesn't matter now. You guys were right. The whole time." 

No one says a word. They understand exactly what I'm going through. No one dares to say "I told you so" because they're all in shock, all in complete understanding with the dread and betrayal pumping through my veins, choking the life out of me. 

Once I compose myself enough to drive, I head back to the school. None of us have much of an appetite after that lovely show. Every single one of them gives me a sympathetic nod as they get out and return to their respective cars. Carmen, on the other hand, needs a ride home. She suggests going with Renee instead, but I insist that I'm fine to do it. Part of me just can't bear to be alone quite yet. 

The car ride is a silent one. Not awkward, but strained all the same. No radio, no clearing throats, just the roar of the engine and the squeaking of tires and the flicking of traffic lights. When I pull up to Carmen's adobe house, she hesitates for a second before getting out. I look over at her. 

"Open your eyes, Chase. Adrienne's not the only girl in the world."

***

I sit in my driveway for longer than I mean to. I punch the steering wheel more times than I can count, until I feel like I released most of my energy into that stupid piece of plastic. I have always liked Adrienne, but I never admitted it, not even to myself. Our denial was rooted so deeply in the unspoken manual of our friendship that the possibility always seemed too impossible to speculate about. And now she's with my mortal enemy. And he's going to break her heart. And she is going to continue to disregard my endless warnings. As I rest my throbbing head on the steering wheel, my phone begins to play a Twenty One Pilots song, signifying a call from Adrienne. I pick up my phone wearily and peer at the screen, at the pixelated face made up of  a thousand tiny stars, at Adrienne's smiling, glowing face. I laboriously click the IGNORE button, making the screen go dark once again.