In Dire Need of Cessation

Twenty-Nine

Despite how vampires could run without leaving any indication of a footprint, all ten of our feet began to be swallowed by the greedy mud. At this time of the year, though, it wouldn't surprise me if the rock pools of water that were potholes created by our feet, were ice patches by tomorrow.

Ignoring the worms that had uncovered themselves to claim the needed air, and the black blanket of dead leaves, which were once an array of magnificent colors that would brighten anyone's mood, I sliced my shovel through the open-mouthed dirt, which was hungry for more feet to be a milkshake to suck.

Like gravediggers, my family and I worked in silence, listening to the remaining drops of rain slip from their temporary home of a leaf's surface. Not one of us could think of something appropriate to say, yet our minds were blaring with a range of thoughts.

Without communicating, my family and I shared one idea: to use our vampire speed. Why would we waste precious time digging a hole at a human pace, when Bella needed to be treated? (Fear that this wouldn't work?) There was no justifiable answer!

The dirt was quickly displaced with the upturned grass, which had been one of the many signs of Mother Nature's growth in this cemetery. We were careful not to throw the invaluable mud onto the broken gravestone that Esme thoughtfully carried away from the exhibition.

"What would happen if we were to not collect all the bones? If, perhaps, a mere phalange was missing, or blanketed by the earth, but we didn't know?" Esme asked with her eyebrows furrowed, her navy blue cardigan sleeves rolled to her elbows, and her hair tucked firmly behind her ears. The determination was painted on the canvas of her face.

"We are fortunate to have our eyesight as an advantage, plus we know each bone off by heart. But, what I am concerned about is if a splinter of a bone is missing, or we do not organize the bones accordingly. Would Bella's soul act like a magnet, and move the bones in the correct place? Or would she be forever disjointed?" Carlisle listed, unknowingly making me have an internal panic attack.

Why hadn't I thought of all the possible things that could go wrong?! There were millions of mistakes that could happen, it wasn't as if this procedure had ever occurred and actually underwent! If this had ever happened, then there was no record of it!

What would happen if this all went inadequately? Bella wouldn't be able to readmit herself to Heaven, nor would her soul be able to free itself from her physical form and return back to (me) being a spirit.

She would be trapped, caged, isolated away, without me, our family, her family, and her friends.

What was I doing? Why was I encouraging this?!

The speed of my digs increased until I could see the dirt create a permanent brown wheel as if gravity was struggling to keep up.

I was so stupid! I should list everything to Bella, all the possible scenarios, the outcomes, and then certify that she still wanted to continue with this. I was stumbling in the dark with this, fumbling for the switch of information that would provide light in which I would walk in.

I hated being so clueless, so exposed, so accessible.

"Edward," Jasper said over the rasping of the spades as they skimmed past small stones and grazed over tiny shells. "I must say, putting aside all of this horrendous commotion, I have never seen you so...elevated in all the decades I have known you." My expressionless face rose to Jasper's, while my mind thought, taunted, and proved how selfish I was being.

I can feel what you're thinking right now, Edward. I know I am correct when I say, Bella is extremely intelligent, and when she professed her love to you and later agreed on this, she was aware of what could happen. Put your mind at rest, brother, Jasper thought, still looking at me as he dug, expecting an answering for his audible statement.