'Matt?'
'I know I'm one of the last people you want to see right now but I've got some news.'
'...Okayyy? Come in then, I suppose,' I mumbled, still half asleep.
'You, umm, might want to sit down for this, Al.' Matt stated, shaking slightly.
I made my way into the front room and flopped onto the sofa, moulding to the shape of it.
'So, what's so important that you had to wake me up at TWENTY TO TWO in the morning?!'
'Al, it's Pippa...'
'What? What about her?'
'She's... she's in hospital.'
'What?! Why? What happened?'
'She overdosed... She was a wreck after you two argued, I tried to help her but she went completely off the rails, she wouldn't talk to anyone, just locked herself in her room with her bottle of alcohol. I have no idea how she got the drugs though. One night I heard her scream and then heard a thud. I bust down her door to see her passed out on the floor next to her bed, surrounded by bottles and needles and pills. Al it was horrible, I've never seen her so upset.' Matt was shaking and had started crying while he explained what had happened. I put my arm around him and pulled him close.
'Shhh, it's alright,' I whispered to him in an attempt to soothe his ragged and desperate cries.
'Matt, will you take me to see her?'
'Yeah sure Al. Sorry to wake you up, she was asking for you in her sleep, don't tell her I told you though..'
'Won't say a word.'
We sat in silence all the way to the hospital and Matt only spoke inside to tell the receptionist who we were there to see. I stumbled down multiple corridors, clinging onto Matt for support. We finally got to the door and I stood staring at it for a few minutes, scared to go in.
'Go in whenever you're ready love, I'll wait out here.'
I turned the knob and pushed the door hesitantly. I walked into the room, my feet feeling heavy and my stomach doing flips. The Pippa who led in the bed looked nothing like the Pippa I remembered. Her hair was thin and ratty, like she hadn't brushed it for days, her skin was pulled tight against her bones and her eyes had sunk into her skull.
'Pip? It's me, Al...'
'It's about time,' she attempted to chuckle, but I could tell it was forced. Her eyes slid open slowly and looked me up and down.
'You look worse than me,' she commented, trying to make me laugh but all I could do was wince.
'What happened Pip?'
'I don't know Al. The only thing I do know is that I'm going to die. If not tonight then tomorrow or the day after. I'm so glad you came, I just, I want you to know, I forgive you. I know it was mainly, okay it was all my fault that we fell out, but I know that when I die you're going to blame yourself. I know that because I know you, Al. And I don't want you to blame yourself, at all. And if you blame yourself anyway, know that I forgive you, so you don't have to.'
I burst out crying but I couldn't do or say anything. I just held her hand and cried.
'Pip, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have shouted at you, I'm so sorry. Please, just don't die. I've got no one. You can't do this to me. Please!'
I broke down again, crying into Pippa's frail arms.
'I-I can feel it coming Al, I'm going to die. Al, I don't want to die! Please stop it!'
'I can't Pippa! I don't know how! Please, just don't die! Please!'
All of our shouting had caused Matt to burst in, a worried scowl on his face.
'Al, Matt, I'm so sorry, I didn't want to put you through this. At least if I'm going to die I'll be surrounded by my two favourite people. Al, I love you. Matt, I love you. Just remember that, for me. Please.'
'Pippa, please. Don't do this. I love you too, but don't do this, do anything but this. Please!'
I felt what was left of Pippa's strength grip my hand and then she went limp. Her head lolled and the machine began beeping furiously before becoming a strung out beep. I knew it had happened. She was dead. The only person I had left, and she was gone. That was the last thing I remember before falling into a light, terrifying nightmare filled with drugs and beeps.
