Insomniac (taekook)

Part 7

Jungkook POV

I lie alone
Always on my own
Jimin said he would be there for me always
But where is he now?
With Yoongi
Useless good for nothing Yoongi
I still get scared sometimes
When I'm at a coffee shop and I can't find words
When the professor asks me a question and I forget how to speak
It's hard learning practically everything from scratch
Though I've recovered miraculously over the past few months
I'm basically back to normal
Almost
It's not fair
Having half your mind stolen
Your precious memories swiped
It's scary
Waking up one morning and not even knowing your own name
The only words I had to go by were Jimin's
He could be lying for all I know
But I've done amazingly
In the space of a year and a half I've basically learned everything over again
There would just be those few moments were my mind completely blank
Like you're paralysed from the inside out 

"So Jungkook."
He starts , shifting on the sofa to make himself comfortable.

"Why are you so depressed?" He asks.

He seems interested.
His beautiful Chocolate eyes give me a look of content and make me feel warm.
I could lie.
But in order for this thing to work I need to tell him the truth.

"I don't remember much about me." I confess.

"What's do you mean?" He asks , shifting again.

"I-." I gulp and will myself to force out some words.
"I was In a car crash apparently."

"Apparently?"

I wriggle uncomfortably in the armchair.
Why do I get the feeling like I'm being interrogated?

"Yeah well , I don't remember anything about it , Jimin told me everything that happened."

He looks at me and urges me to go on.

"Well it was about a year and a half ago , around September or something , yeah it was September 5th Jimin said."
I see his eyes widen for a second and notice him gulp and lick his slightly dry lips.

"Yeah and um... basically." I choke , worried I might start breaking down.
"Um basically I was on some kind of pills and I killed my parents in this car crash ."
I mumble.

I feel his eyes bore in to me as I stare at the ground.

"Um." He starts
"Do you mind if we sit outside , I really need a cig." He chokes.

I agree and follow him outside.
We sit on the concrete steps outside our dorm building.

He digs in to his pyjama bottoms and pulls out a pack of cigarettes and a pink lighter with Hello Kitty stickers all over it.

He puts the stick of tobacco between his lips and lights it up carefully.

He takes a long deep inhalation of the stick before offering the packet to me.
I don't usually smoke , but right now the thought of smoke invading my lungs and turning my body to tar actually sounds quite appealing.

I light up my own little cancer stick and watch as the smoke rises in the cold night air , like an old fashioned steam train.

"September 5th?" He says out of nowhere.
"That was the date right?"
I nod and take another long drag , savouring  every second.

"September 5th , the same night Namjoon died."