April 11 Pt. 2

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by WriteDrunk

by WriteDrunk

Dear Diary, April 11, 2014

I'm supposed to like girls. I was taught to be normal. Start a family with a wife and grow old with a woman. But what confused me was, is I like waking up next to Ashton. No matter what I was taught, I can't ignore the backflips my stomach does when I hear his morning voice, even if he's crying and yelling at me.

Yeah, I made him cry. And yeah, I feel like a complete dick for it but, hey, he shouldn't have crawled into bed with me last night. No matter how much I liked it.

He says I asked him to. But why would I want to confuse myself more than I already am? The last thing I remember is being on a date with Aleisha. Not having sex with a friend. Especially not a male one.

But I was drunk. So is it possible that I let a side of me show, that shouldn't have?

My mother and father raised me to be open minded. To feel for everyone, no matter how big or small, color of their skin, sexuality, or gender. Everyone is equal.

Then why is it so hard to accept that I liked being next to him? When I came out(though I don't remember doing that), was it hard for me? To accept myself like I'm trying now? It had to be.

Maybe I should apologize to Ashton. I didn't want to make him cry, and honestly, I never want to see it again.

I think I'm going to apologize. I'll be back, maybe in an hour.

-Luke

Okay, maybe it won't end THAT soon, but its not going to be like a hundred chapters haha I'm really bad with exaggerations sorry if I made you cry or anything whoops

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-Katie