Buckingham Nicks-Part II of Fritz Series

Downward Spiral

****A/N slight trigger warning. Lindsey does a not so nice thing in this one. Nothing horrible, but it's not nice either.Also there's some sexual content herein****

October 3rd 1960

"Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday, dear Lindsey! Happy Birthday to you!" my tenth birthday party is everything a kid my age could want. Cake, ice cream, petting zoo, a clown all that good stuff. But this year is special. This year my Mom went out and bought me something I've been begging her and Dad to get me for months. A Gibson j-45 acoustic guitar, sunburst pattern. My hands cradle my new-found treasure in my hands as I blow out the candles on my cake. Everyone else can't wait to dig into the food, I can't wait to start banging away on my new guitar. I'm going to be a Rockstar someday, like Elvis.

"Lindsey, do you like your gift" my dad knees next to me at the table and I nod "I sure do! Thanks pop!" my father pulls me into a bear hug "Your welcome" Mom ruffles my curls cutting me a big slice of cake, a corner piece all of the corner pieces are mine. Cuz they have the most frosting. Jeff glares at me and I stick my tongue out at him. He's such a butt. Greg's got his head in a book, he always does except for when he's reading a newspaper.

"Hey Linds, lets go throw the football around!" my new friend Jefferey and his parents are here. His family is colored which bothered some of my other friends parents. I don't see why he's a pretty neat guy, he knows everything about sports and I like the records he listens to. I feel like I want to play music like that, music that moves you. Anyway Dad said it was my party and I could invite whoever I wanted, so Jeffery and his parents are here.

Finishing my slice of cake, I run to the backyard and we throw around the football playing a pickup game. The losers have to let a girl kiss them. Gross. Dad and Greg are talking politics with another parent, I don't know how he does it. I hate that stuff it's boring. Jeffery lobs the ball at me and I race as fast as I can to catch it our end zone in sight. Just as I feel the ball hit my arms my father screams "Lindsey!" someone pushes me into the grass, tires squeal, there's a loud thump and my dad rolls down the street. "Dad!"

Kneeling next to him I shake his shoulder, he doesn't move. He's covered in blood "Dad! Daddy! Dad! Please wake up! Dad wake up! Dad!"

"Lindsey! Lindsey wake up!" someone is shaking my shoulder I sit upright my chest heaving in the darkness of our bedroom. Stevie's griping my arm "Honey, you were having a nightmare" I can barely catch my breath I can tell I've been crying, my voice is hoarse I've probably been shouting too. Looking down I pull Stevie into my arms "Stephanie, I saw him he was alive just like the last time I-but then he got hit and he was-there was so much blood".

"Shhhh, baby it's alright. It's alright honey, lay down with me, it'll be okay" my arms clutch her to me as she lays us down my face buried in the softness of her breasts, her silky nightgown caressing my cheek as tears leak from the corners of my eyes "Steph, don't leave me. Please, stay with me. I love you" her lips caress my face gently "I'm not going anywhere baby." Her hands stroke my hair lovingly, as she gives me comfort. I need a drink. I want a drink. I can't go back to sleep.

Maybe one of my pills, they're tranquilizers they put me to sleep. Stevie already gave me one last night. I don't have any pot in the house, a joint usually relaxes me enough to sleep. I need something. I need something. Stevie got pain killers after she gave birth to Sara, she never took them. She doesn't like pills, they're in the medicine cabinet. She wouldn't know. I lay with her, waiting for the tell tale signs of her slumber, her breathing even her hands slackening on my shoulders.

Gently I pull away from her, kissing her cheek softly. My beautiful angel, my soul mate. I need to sleep we have a rehearsal in the morning. Dad would want me to take care of my family, I can't do that if I don't sleep. I feel a prick of shame in the back of my mind as I dump three of the pills into my hands, but it's not like I do this all the time. Just this once. Just to sleep. Tomorrow will be different. I head into the kitchen grabbing a beer swallowing all three pills at once.