Soukoku - Silent Understanding

8

"Let go of me!" Chuuya shouted, flailing about in an attempt to get Dazai off him.

But Dazai was relentless, easily pinning Chuuya onto the floor. He held the mans hands up, hoping it would keep him down if only a little while. If Chuuya wouldn't listen he had no choice but to do this, he needed to tell the man. Tell him how he really felt.

"Chuuya listen to me, if only for a little bit," Dazai whispered, pulling himself away so he could look at Chuuya's face. He was angry, rightfully so, but Dazai knew it would pass.

Chuuya stubbornly kept silent, looking away from Dazai in defiance. Who did he think he was to pin him down like this? Chuuya was much stronger than Dazai but for some reason he couldn't get the man off him. It was like all his strength had suddenly vanished and all that was left was fragile limbs and a hopeless heart.

"I didn't want to break the way things had been going on between us," Dazai said, making Chuuya eyes widen. He was talking about the past, wasn't he."Did you know that you were my first ever friend? Well at least thats what I thought, since we never talked to each other."

Chuuya scoffed and glanced over at Dazai, his eyes widening at what he saw. The man had a tiny smile curling around his face and Chuuya would be damned if his heart didn't skip a beat at the sight of it.

"I always stared at your back turning class, you know. I thought that if I stared hard enough that maybe one day you might turn around at stare back at me." Dazai let out a pitiful laugh, a smile still on his face."I was such a fool."

"And then you put that candy in my show locker and I felt so incredibly happy. Do you know I was planning on talking to you the next day? But then you left and I swear my heart broke."

Chuuya squirmed underneath Dazai, he couldn't handle it. Dazai was pouring his heart out to him and all he could do is lay there, gaping like a fish. But Dazai held him steady, even though his hands were shaking he didn't budge an inch. It was out of some sort of desperation so that he could keep him there to hear his story, to hear his feelings.

"And I couldn't stop thinking about you and how I wanted to twirl your hair around my finger and wrap my arms around your back and never let go." Dazai stopped for a breath, resting his head on Chuuya's chest and taking a deep breath."Then I found you all these feelings came down on me like a tidal wave. I missed you so much."

Dazai looked back up, leaning closer to Chuuya and staring into his eyes."But more than that I realized. I love you, you stupid hatrack."

Chuuya stopped breathing, trying to comprehend what Dazai just said. But before he could do anything, Dazai's lips were on his. They were needy, as if this kiss was his last salvation.

This only made Chuuya tense up more. He didn't know what to do, the need to kiss back and the fear that came with it was tearing him up inside. So, he squirmed underneath he in an attempt to get away. It was to much. Dazai's feeling were to much and he couldn't help but feel guilty at the weight of it. It was much more than he deserved.

Dazai's hand slipped and Chuuya used the chance to push the man off him, wiping his mouth and moving away. Dazai now stood between him and his way out but he could easily over power him if things came to that.

Chuuya grabbed his school bag that lay on the floor, pushing Dazai aside and making his way towards the door as quickly as possible."I'm leaving!" He shouted, opening the door.

Then he stopped, feeling like he had left something behind. He put his hand on his head, feeling around for the hat that should obviously be there."What?! Where the hell is my hat?!" He shouted, glaring at the only person who could be the culprit for such a thing.

Dazai huffed, letting a smirk run along his face."I left it behind because of his ugly it was. Hats don't suit you at all Chuuya, you shouldn't bother trying to wear them. Its so not cute."

"Shut up shitty Dazai! I don't want to hear that from you!" Chuuya growled out, stomping away in a huff and slamming the door behind him.

Dazai let out a little laugh, a genuine smile crossing his face. This was good, he could still talk to Chuuya the same. And though he confessed his love, it looked like Chuuya could still act the same around him as well. Things weren't awkward between them, things hadn't changed which made Dazai happy.

Looks like he still was a fool.