Daddy's Little Girl

Chapter 20

*Two Weeks Later*

Yesterday was a hard day for me. I just couldn't deal. I have to go back and see him again before it's to late though. I grab Scott's hand and walk to his assigned room. He looks to be asleep but as I walk closer to him, I notice he's not. His pretty brown golden eyes are no longer those that I remember. No. These were glossy and seem to be a bit cloudy. I look at him and say, "Hey daddy." He tried to say something but can't because his mouth is a bit to the side, as if he's had a seizure or something. No. He's had another stroke. I tell him, "It's okay daddy. You don't have to talk. It's okay." I sit beside him and hold his hand. Looking him in the eyes, I tell him the hardest thing I've ever had to say, "Daddy, I don't want you to suffer anymore. I know you're trying to hold on for G, Raylin, mom and I, but you don't have to. You don't have to be strong anymore. It's our turn to be strong for you. We love you daddy. It's okay to let go and go home. We'll miss you something terrible, and it'll be hard but it's okay. When you're ready to leave us, you just go right ahead. You fly high and he happy. I love you daddy." Right as I said that his machine started beeping slower and slower til it went flat line. I cover my mouth and begin to cry my eyes out. My dad is no longer here. He died right in front of me. The nurses come in and have me leave the room. I call mom and tell her the news. She breaks down over the phone and says she's leaving work. I drive home and walk in to see Daniel and Gisela cuddling on one sofa and Raylin coloring on the other one. I take a deep breath. "G. Raylin." I say. "Dad... Dad is gone... He died twenty minutes ago holding my hand." Raylin screams and runs upstairs crying her eyes out. Gisela blinks and chokes up asking. "H...he what?" I nod and she buries her face in Daniel's shirt. I give her a hug and run up to check on our little sister. I knock on her door and she yells, "GO AWAY NICOLE! JUST GO AWAY!" I sigh and walk in giving her a massive hug. "I'm so sorry, Ray." I tell her. She cries a little harder shaking her head. "Why Nicole?! Why did we have to lose dad?! Why did it have to be him?!" She hits me and runs to the bathroom, locking it behind her. I sigh and go to my room. I take my pocket knife out and slit my wrist, not once, not twice, but three times. I watch as the blood pours out. After about five minutes or so, I decide to clean myself up. Scott walks into my bathroom. "Nicole, no! Why baby?!" He says. "Don't cut no more baby. Please don't." I cry as he holds me. "Please. I know it all hurts and what you've been through hasn't been easy, but you're going to get through it. I promise you will. You aren't alone and your dad wouldn't want this for you, beautiful. I nod my head as he finishes talking. He rubs my back, until I fall asleep in his arms. He then carries me to my bed and tucks me in. I wake up a few hours later and realize it wasn't just a dream. My dad is really gone. I walk downstairs and fix me a big bowl of ice cream. Cookie dough to be exact, My dad's favorite. I break down while eating the first two bites. I decide to make it a milkshake instead. Just as I take the fifth sip, I feel sick to my stomach. I run to my bathroom and throw up everything I had all day. Gisela walks into the bathroom holding my hair back. "Nicole are you okay?" She asks me. I wipe my mouth and grab my tooth brush. "I'm not sure G. I've honestly been getting sick like this off and on, since I came back home. I don't know what going on with me anymore. Maybe I'm just stressed." Gisela shakes her head and asks me, "Nicole, could you be pregnant?" I begin to cry again. "Gisela, if I am, I don't know who the dad would be. Scott didn't use a condom the night I lost my virginity or the times after that. Now that I think about it. However, David and John didn't use anything when they took advantage of me neither. I tried to fight back, but John was to strong and David would only be more rough and hit me." She sighs and says calmly, "Look sis, I'll go to the store and get you a couple of tests and we will go from there." I nod and wait for her to go and come back. Within forty five minutes, she's back with three tests. The first one only takes about thirty seconds. Positive, It reads. The second and third ones, come out the same way. I cry in her arms. She rubs my back; shushing me. "Shhh Nicole. It's going to be okay. I'm going to be here for you all the way through. I support your decision to keep it or give it up, but I'm against abortion." I nod in agreeing with her and have her call and set me up a baby appointment. They get one set as soon as tomorrow, at two thirty in the afternoon. I decide to just sleep the rest of the day away. Ten hours later, I wake up in Scott's arms. He must had stayed over again. It was lunch time, so it felt like. I checked the clock, only to see it was six twenty. Damn, it's early. I go back to sleep after taking a shower. It didn't wake me up like I planned it to. I wake up again with an hour to get ready and be there. Gisela tells Daniel, "Baby, I have to go somewhere with Nicole but we'll be back on a couple of hours." He says okay and kisses her goodbye. I walk into her room and ask her, "Are you ready to go?" She smiles and says to me, "Yeah I'm ready. You look cute today." "Thanks G." I tell her. We make it to Oh Baby and I fill out the heaps of paperwork and am taking straight back. They do a pap smear and blood work, then I'm put in a room. I hope everything is okay. The main nurse under the OB comes in and says, "We're going to do an ultrasound to see exactly how far along you are." After ten minutes or so, in the process she says, "Looks like you're two months along. Eight weeks and four days." She prints off a picture for me and then has me wipe the jelly substance off my stomach. Gisela takes a picture of me holding my belly. It isn't much of a bump, but due to me being small before, you can definitely tell, when paying attention. I'm going back to the room I was in earlier and wait for the doctor to come in. A few minutes later, he walks in and tells me, "Nicole I'm going to cut to the chase. The baby looks to be alright and growing accordingly. However, we will have to monitor you throughout your pregnancy. You have Hepatitis B. I'm not sure how you could had gotten it, due to you having all your series of shots but you do. Getting a shot now would do absolutely nothing for you." With that being said, we leave...