Page 492

For Worse

           Six months later
                Illi's POV
    "Are you okay?" Leslie asks me as she feeds Arial. I nod, placing my hand on my lower stomach. "You look pale. Do you need some water?"
    A sharp pain awakens in my lower abdomen. "Can you hand me my phone?" I ask her. She reaches over to the stand and hands me my phone. Before I can go to the contacts, the phone drops from my hand and I clench my stomach, my shoulders slouching.
     ×××××××××
      "I'm sorry I took so long," Jules says. His voice sounds distant as he talked to Leslie outside the door. He comes in and rushes over to me. "Hey, baby."
    I force a smile. "I don't feel good," I mutter. He runs his knuckles down the side of my face, his eyes locked with mine.
    "How many centimeters are you down?" He asks.
    "Eight," I answer. "I have to be at least ten to start." He places his hand on my semi-big stomach. I didn't get a bug as we thought I'd get, meaning she'll be very small.    I take deep breaths. "Can you hand me that trash can?" I ask him.
    He goes to the corner of the room and sets it down next to the bed. I scoot over a little bit and look at him with tired eyes. Even now when I'm about to have a damn baby, I want to jump his bones cause he looks so damn good in his uniform.
    "Lay down with me?" I ask him. He nods and gets onto the relatively large bed. "I'm scared." He kisses my forehead gently.
    "So am I, Mami," he says.
    ×××××××××
     Soft cries awaken in the room as I struggle to catch my breath. Jules leaves my side and goes over to the doctor, looking down at our daughter with a prideful smile.
           ××××××××
             Jules's POV
       The doctor places Martina in my arms after they've done what they needed too. Illi and I were right about her being very small. A doctor runs over to Illi and yells at the other doctors.
    "She's still bleeding bad," he shouts. My heart rate picks up as I hear that. The nurse that handed me Martina takes her back and puts her on the small cradle. She pushes me to the door.
    "You have to step out into we get this under control," she tells. The door closes, separating me from Illi. A hand claps onto my shoulder. I turn around to see Marcus.
    "What are you doing out here?" He asks. I shake my head, blinking back tears. A look crosses his face where he realizes what's happening.
   "I can't lose her," I say, my voice cracker. Her parents walk in the doors and make their way over. I wipe away my tears.
    "What happened?" Her dad asks me. I shrug.
    "Um, they pushed me out cause they had to do something they didn't think I would want to see. But she's okay and so Martina," I say. They smile gratefully at the lie.
     ××××××××××
       Her parents left, but Marcus stayed back with me. It's been nearly an hour and I haven't gotten any news. She could be dying in there for I know. The door opens and a doctor steps out.
   I stand and rush over. "She's okay, fragile, but okay. She lost a lot of blood and we had to give blood transfusions. There was retrained tissue which is what caused the bleeding to occur. You can go see her now. She's feeding your daughter."
    "Thank you," I tell him as he walks away. Marcus stands and walks over to me. "She's okay." He let's out a deep breath.
    "Well, um, I'll come by tomorrow to see you guys and make sure everything is okay," he says. I walk into the room to see Illi feeding Martina, looking down at her with a smile.
    "She's so beautiful," she says as she looks up at me. She throws her head back against the pillow and closes her eyes. "Ouch." She winces.
    "Does it hurt?" I ask. She shrugs.
   "Its uncomfortable, but the nurse said I'll get used to it, and I can switch to the bottle when I want," she tells me. I pull the chair closer to the bed and look at my daughter.
    "We did it. We're parents," I say. She looks at me with a tired smile. Martina starts whining so I take her in my arms and bounce up and down, trying to calm her. Soon she stops and falls asleep.
     "For someone who didn't want kids, it fits you," she says. I smile and kiss my littles girls forehead and lay her down in the cradle. I make my way back to Illi.
    "You look like hell," I say. She rolls her eyes.
    "Thanks, Santos," she says sarcastically. I kiss her gently. "Lay down with me?" She asks. I stand and get in beside her.
    ×××××××××
       When I held her in my arms, it was like all was well again when things were going to hell. She made me feel like I could be more than I was. When her lips were in mine, it felt like everything just disappeared and it was just her and me. Like there would never be any harm to come to us.
       But her arms around me was a different story, it made me have worth, or at least feel like I had some. I grew up feeling like I was going to be a no-good version of my so-called father. I'd be a repeat of all his horrible life decisions. But she made me feel like I could be something more than his son.
    Everyone thinks I'll be just like him, like a bootlegs version, but she doesn't. She makes me think I can grow into my own person and start a life that was nothing like his.
     I close the book and rest it in my lap. A few more chapters and I'll finally finish the book that changed my relationship with Illi. Looking down at Illi, I smile. She's everything I could have wanted and more.
      ××××××××
             Illi's POV
     The feeling of Jules getting up wakes me. I turn onto my side, trying my vest not wince. He takes a now awake and slightly whinny Martina into his strong arms. She's already very small, but when he's holding her she's like a pebble.
     "Its okay, I've got you," he tells her in a whisper as he lays her down on the changing table. He changes her and picks her back up. "We don't wanna wake mommy. She isn't a good mood when someone wakes her up." Excuse me?
    
    AN: Eventful chapter. I'm not even gonna apologize if this sicks cause I think its pretty good. Please comment something you want to happen (Its a way for me to involve you guys)!!! Share!!! Stay alive |-/       -Veah