Into you (a klaine and phan fanfiction)

Chapter 11

He ruined everything, as usual. Maybe there was a reason why he had never found that special someone. Probably Dan was right.

And here he was, hand in hand with his boyfriend, pretending everything was fine. They entered the cafè, the warmth of the place surrounded them, forcing the odd group to hang their coats. Kurt couldn't take off his sweater, dark purplish bruises would appear on his neck, marks of what shouldn't have happened. Would he ever stop feeling this guilty? The worst part was that, although everything about that night was still unfocused and confused because of the alcohol, he knew he enjoyed it, he enjoyed Dan's hands touching him and his body on his. And this disturbed him more than anything, the thought that he raped his friend. his only friend. Why was he such a terrible person?

The cafè was very cozy, or at least it would have been if Dan and Kurt were able to relax. The mere meeting of their eyes caused immediate grief and regret, they didn't speak, either, they just listened silently to Blaine, who was cheerfully talking about his high school senior year.

That was mainly the reason Dan stuck with Blaine: he was always able to make him smile and to make his spirit rest. He couldn't possibly hurt anyone, unlike him. He didn't deserve him.

"Hey pals" a voice interrupted Blaine's monologue. It was one of NYADA's seniors, the hoste of the party.

"Good god, Dan. You went wild last night" the boy exclaimed, amused.

"What do you mean?" Dan couldn't remember how he ended up with Kurt, but he imagined being hopelessly high and sobbing in a corner until Kurt came to "rescue" him-

"Well...you were so horny! Not sure I'll be able to sort that scene out of my head, bro" he was interrupted by a girl, calling him and left with a wink.

Dan was unable to speak; he looked at Blaine. seeing the trace of suspect upom his face. He doubted. The taller boy rushed home with an excuse and ran into the toilet. He opened the cold water and brought it to his eyes. He stared into the mirror, the face looking back at him wasn't his. Not anymore. Was he turning into him? He cheated. He broke his vows, the highest of his values was loyalty. He swore he would always be faithful, since he understood what that meant. He made a promise to himself and wasn't able to keep it. He hurt Blaine, the only person who didn't leave him alone.

His legs melted under him, causing him to crash on the floor, holding his knees, sobbing and thinking about what he turned into. A monster.

"Dan" Kurt knocked on the door "Dan, please, let me talk" he begged.

"Where is Blaine" Dan asked, harshly

"I sent him away, buying you something. Please let me come in" Kurt never had a friend, he had been ostracized at school because of his sexuality, beaten until he bled, noone offered him a shoulder to cry on. And now he fucked up. Dan would never forgive him and he couldn't say if he could ever forgive himself either.

The british guy didn't open the door. He knew the truth now, but he wasn't ready to face it.

"I'm sorry" Kurt, said, at last, tears leaving his eyes.

"I am too" Dan rested his head on the door.

they were both alone, sharing the fault of what changed their lives, maybe forever. Together but separated, both incurably wounded. They both know just a miracle could save their friendship.