text me | tj + jd

7.2

josh
-last text
;

i wonder as i sit here on the cold, empty, living room floor if i would have just come to terms with my self - that i am hopelessly in love with tyler joseph - then, tyler would be sitting next to me in my arms. i stare at the close to empty bottle of whiskey on the counter begging me to come closer. maybe if i drink i won't think about it all. all the fucked up shit that has happened in our lives.

before i ended up home - where i am now - i was at the police department talking of my kidnappers. i was taken there by jenkins after we somehow got away from. jenkins did the most of the talking at first. i think the police and jenkins realized how shaken up i was. i mean who wouldn't after leaving their best friend for death... death. the sad part was that i had to start talking pretty early since jenkins could only tell them what happened before the kidnapping and after. i told the police mostly everything - only leaving out the part that tyler liked drugs a bit too much. i wouldt be able to tell anyone what i told the police exactly - not because i was told i wasn't allowed to. it's because my mind and thoughts were somewhere else. it was as if i was outside my own blabber mouth body looking in to world through an hour glass. how silly time is...

after the excruciatingly painful police interrogation i walk half heartedly home. i must have told jenkins that i wanted to walk home since i didn't live too far away. i couldn't exactly remember. once i finally got home after walking what felt like two miles, i walked ghost like to the hidden bottle of whiskey that was given to me as a gift from high school graduation. the only thing i can remember from the time i spent with that bottle only minutes ago would be me purring shot after shot until i gave up and drank out of the bottle.

i never really liked drinking during high school it made me out of control and i couldn't stand it. but i was tired of being in control all the damn time. i was tired of being the good boyfriend or the "ill always be there" friend. maybe i needed someone to be that friend for me. i needed a break and i must have found it because i felt so broken.

i didn't know ty very long.

but now that i look back...

i feel as if we were meant to be together forever.

it sounds cheesy...

but it's the truth.

i wish i could tell him that i was sorry for breaking his heart so many fucking times.

i'm in tears at the point sitting - coming close to laying - on my floor.

i saw my phone light up with a random kik notification from an old old friend; the one who made the group chat that brought me and tyler together. the thought of the old, random group chat gave me an idea. it was probably the horrifying Hope slipping me this idea but i didn't give a fuck anymore. i wanted to be out of control.

i reach for my phone and pull up ty's number.

in whiskey filled hope, i start to type out a message to him.

it was the simple message we sent each other when we wanted to talk.

as i hit send, i thought back to when tyler first didn't answer my texts.

if only tyler would text me back.

text me back ty please, i begged.

great. now i'm begging for the dead.

maybe my vision had been blurring as i read what was on my phone screen, but i swore that the top of my screen read, "ty bby is typing."

i placed my phone down slowly. my heart hurting more and more as a scooted away from the glowing screen. this wasn't possible. it could be him, but it could be someone else. the ding from my phone startles me and i flinch away for a moment. the curiosity flowing through my veins pulls my closer to the hurtful glowing phone. i squint for the screen seemed all too bright. my heart beats faster and faster. i thought it was going to pop out of my chest or i'd have a heart attack. i sat dumb founded at the text that was sent to me.

"who is this?"

***
annnnnnnndddd that's the end. oof. look at me pulling an ultimate cliffhanger. i apologize for how long it took me to end this. i might write a sequel but i also probably won't. who knows?

also tell me what you think!
-any questions for me?

this chapter was written very emotionally from me. please excuse the mistakes and shortness of the chapter.

this book took a long time to finish i hope u enjoyed.

- read my other books if ya want more lmao i love you all sm :) talk to me if u ever feel lonely bc that's me all the time