Yeager Chronicles: After Extinction

19: Optimus

"You are never allowed to be my co-pilot, ever again," red wings flared warningly to her mate who flinched with her optics. "I'm sorry. Forgive me for not seeing the ground proximity sensor." She lifted herself from the seat, the belt making a sharp click when it went back into place on the underside of the seat. "We didn't crash," Moondancer added, attempting to cool her carrier's temper. She received a scolding glare instead, so much for that approach.

Optimus only unclicked himself, mindlessly beginning to move about the cabin. They're on Earth. He's on Earth. His spark pulsed hard inside its casing, feeling particularly hot beat go against the Matrix. It wasn't something he was used to feeling but he was no stranger to pain of any sort. War does that. So he ignored that scratching heat and walked towards the door to the engine room, only standing there.

"I've got connections here," Nightblade popped. "If we just go out willy nilly there's gonna be some very heavy fire power coming towards us." It was not directed towards him. Optimus turned back to face the three femmes, listening to them start to conversate quickly. He took a tentative step forward. "Who are these connections?" They three stopped at the sound of his baritone. The silver femme straightened. "A couple generals, a couple former presidents, a commander for here and there." He raised a brow at the vague comment. When had she gotten to know people for higher positions? But he knew he could trust her so he did not her question as to how, however, he that wouldn't stop him from thinking about it. At least he'd be thinking about something other than the past that he'd caused.

He watched as she waved a single finger in front of her lips. Optimus gave her a curious gleam, optics narrowed. They three waited until she started talking, but he completely started back into his head. He tried to focus primarily on their mission.

In search of the Knights' Terminus, which, that would be the easy part. Figuring out what was causing the odd signals, that would most likely be just as simple as finding the ship, thus, finding out what -- or rather who is causing the signals. But what the point? It wasn't what mattered to him, not right now. The one human, well three humans but primarily this one human. He wondered why still why Cade still lingered in the back of his mind. He still wondered how this man was, and if he still maybe thought about him.

Cade and his daughter probably don't even like him, or even care that he's gone. That little thought made his spark stab against his casing, adding to the ache that was already there. Optimus did not wish to believe this, that Cade did not care. But he knew that it was a long shot to even consider that they didn't hate him for leaving.

And his Autobots. He left them too. He turned away from the femmes, optics dimmed with his pained consideration. He betrayed them. He left them to fend for themselves. He ordered them to stay and protect Cade and his family. How would even they look to him now? Simple answer: they won't. They were not all too happy to see him again those years ago. Hound sounded jovial and listened to him, but he was a Wrecker, and Wreckers were loyal to their cause. And he practically betrayed his cause for something he wasn't sure existed. Maybe he hoped it existed -- those Creators, so that he may end their turmoil with him, one less war to have to fight on the same and ever growing battlefield.

But he was wrong, wasting what little resources he had acquired and squandered them to search for nothing more than an essence amongst the stars. His frame began to heat, optics downcast as his realizations continued to stab him in his own spark. Damn these feeling or regret -- guilt! He didn't mean any of this to go this far! He... just wanted to help.

His armor flared, allowing some heat to dissipate without the embarrassment of clicking his fans on, but even the air on the ship wasn't much help. Optimus didn't want to focus on what was occurring with the quiet whirl that seemed to be coming from just outside of the ship. "That would be them now," Nightblade stated; he didn't turn to see her expression. She'd know he was thinking too hard, over analyzing again if she only saw his optics. They all waited a moment more, all the while Optimus was only wanting to just stay away -- from humans and sadly, from them too. Maybe this was a bad idea coming down here again. It only brought forth emotions that he didn't want to feel so deep curl around his spark, a feeling he tried dearly to ignore.