(POV) JOHN:
It's been a day since I found Alex dead in the Alleyway. I just stood there in shock before I let myself cry. I felt bound by an eternal darkness, like a massive black cloak had been wrapped around me. But I couldn't get out. Endless flowers and sorry for your loss get sent and left scattered on my dressing table, stuffed in drawers and lying askew of the kitchen table. Lafayette let me cry onto his shoulder for about an hour last night. Then we listened to music, and watched movies. We drunk ourselves stupid.
He tried to explain to me that it wasn't Mulligan's fault. But it was. I needed someone to blame, someone to give the burden of Alex's death. I hated him. He hadn't even called round... he only left one message. And sent a card... and came round seven times... and I may have shut him out, ripped up the card, and deleted the message. I hadn't listened but I mean what could he have to say? He's just a drunken oaf.
Today I had another panic attack. I felt like I was being strangled, my legs stopped working and I began crying... or screaming.... then that point in my memory it goes fuzzy until it hurts my head. I can't remember a thing.
I invited everyone but Mulligan round for tonight. Lafayette will help me. He already is. He's out getting beer and various other drinks. Just a little get together - a help each other through this horrible stage sort thing.
I wore one of Alex's old sweaters, the smell of him making me smile. I could imagine him pushing some of the darkness off me.
"I will never forgive Mulligan, Alexander. I will be the best boyfriend. I have already arranged your ceremony, a beautiful one it will be. I haven't invited Mulligan. I promise."
I could murmur on and on to him. He surely went to heaven but even so it is my job now to protect his legacy.
Then I begin to cry. Ugly tears with snot and itchy red eyes, the bawling sort. And I lay on the floor like this for at least an hour. How could the Lord let such an innocent man die so horribly? I was disgusted.
I stare down at my one of my turtles - Sheldon. He's crawling around so I smile and pick him up.
"Where's your brother?" I ask the little guy.
Then almost on cue, Alexander nudges my leg. Maybe I could get through this? I smile and go to feed them. Maybe it won't be so bad.
YOU ARE READING
Raise a Glass {COMPLETED}
FanfictionWhat happens after Alex is mysteriously shot to death in an Alleyway beside his home. No one knows who shot him or why. (AU - College (Kings College)) (Suggested) Age Group: 10+ (May Include Swearing, Violence and Various Drug use.) [COMPLETED]
