Raise a Glass {COMPLETED}

Chapter 7: Depression

(POV) Madison:

My hands shake as I open the small box of pills. I take one before placing them back into the small drawer in my desk.
These pills are my calm in the storm. Whenever I need them they're there.
Ever since Alex died, I've felt empty. An emptiness that fills my chest and stomach. But the emptiness is so empty, it feels like guilt. Guilt that I helped make this guys life a misery. Guilt that I hurt him.
I wonder if Thomas feels the same. Maybe yes? Maybe not?
I go downstairs to see if he's there and Thomas glares at me.
"What the fuck do you think your doing down here?" He says, crossing his fabulous purple arms.
"Nothing." I mumble, fidgeting with a strand of hair.
"For gods sake!" He shouts, "Get the fuck upstairs!"
"I live here too Thomas!" I mutter, hoping he didn't hear me.
"How dare you!" He shouts, his spit spraying. "I told you not to come down!"

Then he hits me.

Don't be alarmed, this always happens; you just have to grit your teeth and pretend your fine. I mean you are fine. But that day something inside me snapped. Maybe it was when he threw me to the floor afterwards, or the way he sneers as he says "I'm not done with you". I don't know what it was but I charged upstairs.

My hands shook once again and I nearly dropped the small - yet effective - round pills. Then I took them and sat down to write my note. My note to tell them what happened to me. Why I did it. It would take a few minutes for them to kick in.

Dear Whoever this Note may Concern,
This is my Death Note - my suicide note. I, James Madison, have committed suicide here in my bedroom.
I have overdosed and I knew it was my time to pass soon enough.
To anyone who may ask the question "why?", Mr Thomas Jefferson is the reason why.
I loved him although I recognised he was a bully.
I should have stopped him.
Too all that may be concerned, I am very sorry to all victims of Jefferson. Please take note: I was one too.
I won't miss my time on this Earth. Not at all,
And as a Christian man I hope and believe I will go to heaven.
I thank you for any support anyone may have given me,
Your obedient servant,
J. Madison.

I sign my name with a flourish, smiling. I will go down in peace. My death has been my choice, not his, not hers, not anyone's but mine.
Then I lay down on the bed, mutter a quick prayer for everyone I loved and then I fall asleep - to never wake up again.
Before I know it I am gone;
I'm dead.