Broken Pieces (Larry stylinson)

Ch. 9

A/N: Heyyyy! Sorry for not updating in a long time! And!! We are almost at 200 reads! Omg thank you! And start the song when it says (Verse one) You Guys should totally!! Subscribe to her YouTube it's amazing! BTW the song she's is singing, is a original of hers, she writes her own songs and yeah she is amazing:) Okay enjoy this long ass chapter!

Louis POV.

After I said goodnight to my sisters, I went to the bathroom attached to my room. I found the blade. The voices in my head started telling me everything that was wrong with me. Ugly, dumb, untalented , unloved, disappointment. Those words kept repeating them self in my head, over and over again. Angry, sad tears streamed down my face.

Blood. Blood everywhere. I cleaned myself up, and walked in to my room again. I was still crying. Ugly sobbing. I needed to get my emotions out, so I grabbed my ukulele, and my notebook, and started writing my feelings down.

(Verse one)

I'm weak, not strong

I'm small, not tall

I'm young, not wise

Can't say I've seen much trough these naive eyes

I wrote the first verse. It was very true. I am not that strong, people used to call me weak all time. And I'm not tall, I never been. I have always been smaller than other boys my age. They called me a girl sometimes.

(Chorus)

You're thinking of yourself negatively again

Stop, no, don't begin

You're digging yourself down into a hole

Deeper and deeper and darker it goes

It was hard not to think negatively about myself, and it was hard to stop...

(Verse two)

I'm cold, not warm

Can't feel anything anymore

I'm numb, I'm gone

I let my eyes unfocus, everything went blank, and I can't get back to where I was

I'm always cold, because I don't eat that much. I like being numb, I feel numb when I cut, because it makes my emotional pain go away.

(Chorus)

You're starting to lose yourself again

Stop, no don't begin!

You're digging yourself down into a hole

Deeper and deeper and darker it goes...

(Verse three)

I'm done, I'm tired

I hate that I'm wired this way

I'm human, merely blood and guts

And a scrawny skeleton

I am tired of living, I just wanted to die, but I didn't want to leave my mum... I hated how I look! "You look like a girl", they told me, I'm so small, I hate myself.

(Chorus)

You're thinking of yourself realistically again

Stop, no don't begin!